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Godparents advice please help! Sorry it's a little long. Please don't bash.

My very good friend since high school just had a baby and now shes planning a baptism for the baby. I voiced to my DH a few weeks ago that I was hurt that she wasn't considering me for the godmother....I know it's selfish but I never get to do anything special for her...her baby shower I was passed over and insulted by her sisters and pretty much told I could come but they did everything without me. My friend knew how hurt I was by it cause I wanted so badly to do something nice for her cause she did for me when I was pregnant. So I was pretty much over she was going to chose one of her sister for the godmother until today when she asked my husband to be the godfather.... I want him to do it cause its for the baby but he knows how hurt I have been with everything and feels awkward doing this without me. What should we do? And how do I talk to her about his concerns? we're at a lose. Please help! oh and she's my sons godmather.

 
Finkette

Asked by Finkette at 8:21 PM on Aug. 29, 2010 in Religion & Beliefs

Level 22 (12,564 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (22)
  • If your husband holds any reservation he should decline. No matter what the reservation. If he can't go in fully committed he does a disservice to everyone. You shouldn't be the one talking to her about it. Your husband should.
    GrnEyedGrandma

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 8:37 PM on Aug. 29, 2010

  • My husband is the Godfather to 2 of 4 of my sister's kids and I am Godmother to the other 2, but when asked we're all 4's Godparents. Just because your not on the paperwork doesn't make it any less special.
    dmbutler

    Answer by dmbutler at 8:46 PM on Aug. 29, 2010

  • Um I don't see a problem with her wanting one of her sisters to be the godmother. Maybe she wants to keep the baby close to hrr family.
    mommy_of_two388

    Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 8:24 PM on Aug. 29, 2010

  • Have you expressed your desire to be the Godmother?
    I mean if she is that close to you talk to her about it openly. I mean what is the worst that could happen? She says no and you seem to already prepared for that. If you are really good friends than you can over come this. I am sorry that you have been treated poorly I have been there too hope it all goes well. (*~~*~~*~~~*~~HUGZZ~~*~~~*~~*~~*)
    agriffinmom4

    Answer by agriffinmom4 at 8:25 PM on Aug. 29, 2010

  • She obviously see's her family more important than you. This shouldn't hurt your feelings, but be happy that she has a strong family bond. Just because she is your sons godmother does not mean that she should feel entitled to make you the same for her child.
    Glamourina

    Answer by Glamourina at 8:26 PM on Aug. 29, 2010

  • All the people I know whose children have Godparents the Godparents are family. Brothers , sisters aunts uncles and few cousins. If taken in the way it was intened being a God parent is a huge responmsibility. You have obligations to the child as they grow. You also have pbilgations should the parents predecease the child. The calls for family in my book, as much as possible anyway.
    GrnEyedGrandma

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 8:28 PM on Aug. 29, 2010

  • I think everyone's miss the point....I was fine with her sister being the godmother....I dont feel owed anything. She asked my husband and he is considering not accepting because of how things have been going down and he says he doesn't want to do it without me....how do I tell her this? should I tell her this?
    Finkette

    Comment by Finkette (original poster) at 8:29 PM on Aug. 29, 2010

  • That doesn't make sense why wont your husband do it? Because he wants you to be the godmother?
    mommy_of_two388

    Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 8:30 PM on Aug. 29, 2010

  • I would be hurt to know that she picked your husband for the G-d Father and not you for the G-d Mother. I would calmly ask her has she ever considered yourself as the G-d Mother? I have a G-d Child who I have tried to stay in contact with. I cannot understand how she has blocked you out at all the different stages of the pregnancy and birth, Keep an open mind and heart and perhaps you will get your answers.

    Joeygoat

    Answer by Joeygoat at 8:30 PM on Aug. 29, 2010

  • I told my Dh he should be the God father because I'm not so selfish to put my feeling before the good of the baby.
    Finkette

    Comment by Finkette (original poster) at 8:30 PM on Aug. 29, 2010

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