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Why do people get divorced and then create a new family?

I just watched Juno again, and it makes me really sad when she talks about how her mom got remarried and has three 'replacement' kids. In all honesty though, people REALLY do this. They have kids from a previous marriage, but plan to have kids with their new spouse as well.
What is their motivation behind having more children with this new spouse? I can understand it if one of the people have never had children, but when both people have children from a previous marriage, what makes them feel they need to have another child together?
To me it makes it seem like they don't care about their previous kids as much after the divorce.


Asked by Mom2unangel at 9:12 AM on Aug. 30, 2010 in Relationships

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This question is closed.
Answers (14)
  • I would hope that this doesn't happen very often, but I think it does on occasion. As another said, there are good blended families and others that are not so good. Sometimes a parent leaves behind their old family and starts over with a new one completely disregarding their other children. That's just a bad person. Someone that needs to deal with their issues and possibly see a therapist. I do think there are many reasons a newly remarried couple decide to have a child together. Every child is a blessing. I would hope that these remarried couples strive to make a good family home and work hard on their relationship for the children. Divorce is hard on children.

    Answer by Desi_Momof4 at 9:58 AM on Aug. 30, 2010

  • Because they are entitled to start over with a nice relationship, when you fall in love, giving a child from that love is all too normal. It doesn't mean you do not care about the other children, if you care you will make it work.

    Answer by older at 9:15 AM on Aug. 30, 2010

  • So does that mean that if a couple is still married and choose to have more children that they don't care as much about their previous children together?

    Maybe the other children are over and they are longing to have a baby in the house again.
    Maybe they yearn someone that has part of both of them.
    Maybe they love the other children so much that they want them to have a sibling.
    Maybe neither of them were done having children in the first place.

    I think that a "replacement" is where a couple splits and one spouse no longer has anything to do with the children...then creates a new family. THAT is replacing. Otherwise, it's just adding to the love.

    Answer by MamaJen74 at 9:28 AM on Aug. 30, 2010

  • My DH and I each have two from a previous marriage, and we now have one together. We love ALL of our kids the same. I don't know where you got the idea about "replacement kids" - that's a ridiculous notion for movies, not real life.

    Answer by Scuba at 9:21 AM on Aug. 30, 2010

  • Really? I couldn't possibly love my son more than I do now (from my previous marriage) and when my fiance and I have another child it will be an addition to the family we have now and both of my children will know that they are loved and one will be replaced.

    Answer by worriedmommy600 at 9:18 AM on Aug. 30, 2010

  • It is easy to judge others when you are not in their shoes. There are good and bad blended families. I would say it is none of my business to try and figure someone elses' life out for them. There are too many variables to put this in a general category.

    Answer by LeJane at 9:26 AM on Aug. 30, 2010

  • I imagine it the motivation would be much like it was with their previous spouse. I'm not sure what one has to do with the other.

    Answer by Xynyth at 9:34 AM on Aug. 30, 2010

  • I would assume it is because they love that person and want to share that amazing experience with that person.

    Answer by shanlaree at 9:46 AM on Aug. 30, 2010

  • Its a new relationship.. a child is a wonderful thing to share.. I love my girls very very much, and I will not love this baby (with a new SO) any more than I love my beautiful little girls. I love them all the same.

    Answer by SuperrMommyy at 10:02 AM on Aug. 30, 2010

  • I meant *some* people really do this. not everyone obviously.

    Comment by Mom2unangel (original poster) at 9:21 AM on Aug. 30, 2010