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smoking and breastfeeding...and mother....

is it better to smoke and breastfeed than to smoke and formula feed? i just wanted to know because my mom doesnt want to see me or my son until i quit smoking...i quit three mos ago but i didnt tell her because i didnt want her to think i quit because she said to. i just dont want to tell her. ive called her several times to see if she wants to see her 5month old grandson and she says no. she is punishing him because she is mad at me. what should i do?

oh...and if i dont do exactly what she says she does quits talking to me...this happens about once every 6-8 mos.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 6:08 AM on Oct. 11, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • is it better to smoke and breastfeed than to smoke and formula feed? i just wanted to know because my mom doesnt want to see me or my son until i quit smoking...i quit three mos ago but i didnt tell her because i didnt want her to think i quit because she said to. i just dont want to tell her


    Wow that sounds kinda childish to me. Just tell her you stopped smoking.Who care if she thinks you stopped because of her. Your a grown woman start acting like one

    Christine113

    Answer by Christine113 at 6:16 AM on Oct. 11, 2008

  • And its better to breastfeed
    Christine113

    Answer by Christine113 at 6:17 AM on Oct. 11, 2008

  • Lets see,you are a mom now, so it seems to me that you are a grownup. It also seems to me that your mom is controlling and you shouldn't let her control you. It is good that you quit smoking , but, that should have absolutely nothing to do with your Mom wanting to see you. Even when our children are grown we are suppose to love them and want them in our life. You need to stop being the only one trying to do the right thing. Don't call her and ask her anymore. Let her call you and you tell her when you are available. Some parents do try to control their older children and its ridiculous. Your smoking at the time is just an excuse on your mother's part. You be your own person and if she doesn't like it, oh well, its her decision to deal with.If it isn' t one thing, it will be another.
    Kat122

    Answer by Kat122 at 6:27 AM on Oct. 11, 2008

  • If you have quit smoking then I would continue to breastfeed, but I was told by my doctor that if you smoke it's better to bottle feed because the nicotine is in your breastmilk.
    sammiesmom2000

    Answer by sammiesmom2000 at 7:18 AM on Oct. 11, 2008

  • Never give in to terrorist threats. Mom is manipulative. Nip it in the bud.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:04 AM on Oct. 11, 2008

  • OK wow! your mom does not sound like a great person, no offense sweetie! What kind of woman refuses to see her daughter or grandchild just because the mother smokes???

    If you want to view the full medical reasoning, I'd say it's better to smoke and breastfeed since baby gets some better antibodies from breastmilk.

    My doctor actually told me that if quiting smoking was too stressful for me while pregnant and then breastfeeding just to wait, the stress would be worse for us than the benefits of not smoking. I smoke, I have a 2 1/2 year old and a 15 month old.

    And maybe you'd be better off without her in your life for a while. IDK just my opinion. I did not speak to my mother for 9 months, she didn't know about her grandson until he was 9 days old. We have a much better relationship now, she even lives with us.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:08 AM on Oct. 11, 2008

  • Stay away fron those smokes, and keep breast feeding, its whats best for you both. Even if you dont breastfeed, you son will still get the second hand smoke from anything you smoke around, even your clothes, wich can cause serious health problems.

    Second. Your mom is the one missing out. If your son grows up not knowing her, he really won't be any worse for it. If you want him to have a grandmother figure in his life, then recruite one. My kids don't have a relationship with my mom, but we have this wonderful woman in our lives who has steped in and taken on that role and loves our kids. She treats them like she is the one blessed to have then in her life, not the other way around.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:55 PM on Oct. 11, 2008

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