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Why do you think he did this?

My fourth grader has a friend in school that they both enjoy each others company anyway he asked me if he can call him I said yes then a couple a days go by he wants to call again (the other boy does to him) anyway I forgot what my ds did and my dh said he was grounded for that moment. After some time goes by he asks his dad if he can call his friend his dad says no wait for the weekend. He walks off and comes to me and asks me if he can call his friend I am like WHAT THE HECK...YOUR DAD JUST TOLD YOU NO!!!! he gets in trouble again... What is wrong with this boy...arg!!!???


Asked by Anonymous at 10:14 AM on Aug. 31, 2010 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

This question is closed.
Answers (5)
  • It's like they never learn that mom and dad are a team, huh? I remember doing that with my parents. Just hoping one of them would give me the answer I was looking for. After a few times of getting in trouble for it (lost what ever I was asking for for a few days), I got the hint and gave up. Just keep up the united front and he'll stop soon. Good luck!

    Answer by Kiwismommy19 at 10:17 AM on Aug. 31, 2010

  • My kids are forever doing this!!! If they they dont like the first answer they go for a 2nd opinion!! Drives us nuts!!!

    Answer by SWEETPEAS3MOM at 10:15 AM on Aug. 31, 2010

  • He's testing the boundaries. It's only natural for a child to attempt to play one parent against the other. He was hoping to get what he wanted from you, as his dad had told him no. Very normal. And a good example of why parents need to follow the same rules.

    Answer by caseyandkids at 10:16 AM on Aug. 31, 2010

  • Why are you "grounding" the child? Does it work? No. Punishment like grounding do not stop bad behavior or teach good behavior. Psychologists know this from research. Kids behave worse, are more violent, sneak (ask other parent), lie, and resent parents. You and your husband can learn to communicate with and parent your child effectively.

    How to Talk So Kids Will Listen is a good book, a good place to start.


    Answer by Gailll at 10:19 AM on Aug. 31, 2010

  • It's called trying to play one parent off the other. Or to ask until they get the answer the they want. Hoping the other parent doesn't know that the first said no. The best way to handles this to ask them what did Dad ( Mom) say. Then say OK we'll see what they said. Once they get caught in that cross fire they learn to take the first answer.


    Answer by oldermomof5 at 10:20 AM on Aug. 31, 2010