Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

3 Bumps

My brother just called...

and said that he & his wife, together for 10 yrs, married for 5, have a 8 yr old son together are gettting divorced. The reason? She's leaving him for a 40 yr old woman, she's 25. My brother is heartbroken! What do I say to him to make him feel better?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:29 PM on Aug. 31, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (14)
  • I'm really sorry. If there is anything I can do let me know, you know I'm always here for you.
    RyansMom001

    Answer by RyansMom001 at 3:30 PM on Aug. 31, 2010

  • Nothing you can say will make him feel better. Just make sure he knows you're there for him if he needs to talk or if he needs a shoulder to cry on.
    SarahLeeMorgan

    Answer by SarahLeeMorgan at 3:30 PM on Aug. 31, 2010

  • I can only relate to this as I was the wife who was left for another man. Same age difference, the kicker now is that the man is now a woman? WTF?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:31 PM on Aug. 31, 2010

  • Just be there to offer any support thats needed, dont always offer adivce, just listen to him. be the friend he needs, & the sister he has.
    lilmoosesmom

    Answer by lilmoosesmom at 3:32 PM on Aug. 31, 2010

  • give her time. Is she being seduced? she is young and will only grow smarter with time...the future is all unwritten....
    surfcitymom

    Answer by surfcitymom at 3:34 PM on Aug. 31, 2010

  • wow, it happens i guess. just let him know your there, call him and check in alot. keep him occupied, hell, fix him up with a FRIEND.. that way he can vent to someone besides family, where did the son go.. hopefullly with dad, id hav\te to think that he has to all sudden deal with mom and another mom>> . good luck...
    fostymom

    Answer by fostymom at 3:35 PM on Aug. 31, 2010

  • You could say...well it could be worse..she could be leaving you for an 18 year old boy or a 65 year old woman..haha!
    Sorry..that was so mean...but you have to find the humor somewhere,lol.

    I have 2 brothers,twins..they are 24 years old. If one of them was to call me with this news, I would say to them....come on over and I'll make your favorite dinner and lets talk.Mostly, I would just listen...sometimes thats more helpful than giving advice,really.But I would say...no matter what, try not to get the children involved.You can't change the way someone is, rather it be easier to accept it and to move on in this situation. Sounds like she's going through something experimental..thats HER thing and most likely nothing to do with him personally. Tell him to take care of himself and be there for his son if he should have any questions..which I'm sure he will...I would even reccomend getting some counseling for him and the boy
    kimberlyinberea

    Answer by kimberlyinberea at 3:35 PM on Aug. 31, 2010

  • thanks ladies! It makes it harder that we're in different far away states. Her mom just left her step dad a couple of months ago so she moved in w/ her mom & took my nephew. She's made it quite clear that if he wants an easy divorce she's going to be the custodial parent.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 3:39 PM on Aug. 31, 2010

  • Wow...sorry to hear about this but you did say his wife is only 25 and they've been married for 10 years, right? Well, that would've made her 15 when he married her and 17 when she had her first child...she didn't get a chance to grow up and now she's exploring...too bad for your brother and the kids...hope everything turns around for the better.
    mom2mybabes

    Answer by mom2mybabes at 3:50 PM on Aug. 31, 2010

  • It wouldn't matter if it's a man or a woman, same age or older- the fact remains, his marriage is ending & he feels like his family is falling apart. Just be there for moral support- a shoulder to cry on, & just to listen. You can't fix this for him- you can only help him through it. You can be there for the kids too. Send little things like matchbox cars, yugio cards (sp?), etc. - along w/ letters telling them how much their loving aunt cares about them. Some family counseling would be good for all of them too.
    mrsmom110

    Answer by mrsmom110 at 3:50 PM on Aug. 31, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Cafemom Join now to connect to other members! Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN