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my boyfriend aka love of my life cheated multiple times sometimes with escorts from craigslist i'm heart broken . now he is begging me to forgive him any advice?

we have been 2gether 2 and a half years and he travels alot for work so i stayed home while he was on the road. i recently found out that he begun cheating 3 months into our relationship and never stopped. i'm talking from regular chicks ,escorts,craigslist, he even flew a woman to visit him at his hotel from another state. mind u all this time i went 9 YES 9 months without any sex being faithful to him but he was having his fun!! he always denied any cheating, but i had that gut feeling so i went through emails etc and finally confronted him with so much evidence he couldnt lie anymore. ps-- i am not full of myself but i am gorgeous and in my mid twenties, he is in his late 30's so i wont have a problem finding someone else. advice anybody??? i am very depressed and i WILL have a hard time trusting another man.

 
maya123

Asked by maya123 at 3:20 AM on Sep. 1, 2010 in Relationships

Level 20 (9,544 Credits)
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Answers (15)
  • Uh yeah. Dump him like yesterday's trash. You're already talking about a new somebody so just do it. Cheaters rarely stop.
    SweetLoveofMine

    Answer by SweetLoveofMine at 3:22 AM on Sep. 1, 2010

  • Once a cheater always a cheater I believe...... sorry.
    Spidermonkey531

    Answer by Spidermonkey531 at 3:23 AM on Sep. 1, 2010

  • he did it once, hes gonna do it again, n if u take him back ur only gonna show him he got away w it so why not do it again, n maybe over n over or maybe make it a lifestyle
    chriskris

    Answer by chriskris at 3:25 AM on Sep. 1, 2010

  • from my experiance, my bf, now husband, is in the army, he did the same thing to me. IF you truly (dont lie to yourself) feel you can forgive him and move on from this and feel that he REALLY will change, then give it a chance, however, your heart may fool you into thinking you can move past it, and years later it will still haunt you every day like a bad nightmare. I know from experiance, this happend to us 7 years ago and I STILL cant get over the anxiety it has cuased me now. I listend to my heart instea of logic and now have serious anxiety issues. He hasn't cheated on me since, but i feel now, knowing how emotionally damaging it has been to me, that i should have cut my ties with him back when instead of continuing our relationship.
    anikahaynes1

    Answer by anikahaynes1 at 3:23 AM on Sep. 1, 2010

  • He's not the love of your life. The love of your life will not treat you like this. You deserve better. Now dump this guy and go find one that deserves you.
    layh41407

    Answer by layh41407 at 6:29 AM on Sep. 1, 2010

  • don't waste any more time on this man. there is a big difference between a solitary mistake and a serial cheater... not that i can put up with either, but can see where one might be forgiven. he has developed patterns and habits that only lots and lots of counseling (for him not your relationship) can potentially break. meanwhile, don't be a doormat and don't get confused about what love is. when two people are in love and in a monogamous relationship they don't cheat and they don't make excuses for their mistakes as a way to not get in trouble.
    figaro8895

    Answer by figaro8895 at 6:49 AM on Sep. 1, 2010

  • The foundation to me of the relationship is trust. He has lost that with you and I think that getting it back would be next to impossible.
    bjane01

    Answer by bjane01 at 7:31 AM on Sep. 1, 2010

  • My advice is don't take him back unless you want to be heartbroken again. Not all men will cheat on you, but perhaps you should try to find one that doesn't have to travel for work. Be up front with whoever comes next from the start, you have been burned and you will need lots of reassurance to trust, even though it isn't his (new guys) fault, he may have to be okay with being checked-up on. Humans have a choice to be monogamous or not and even if they aren't monogamous (we have more than one partner in a lifetime), they have the ability to abstain while in a committed relationship. If they can't be monogamous at any point, they have the option of telling that person that they are with and leaving the commitment. So no, it is not beyond human control to be monogamous in a relationship. Your boyfriend might have a sex addiction though if he feels he can't control himself (he may also just be a douche and not wanting to go...
    Bellarose0212

    Answer by Bellarose0212 at 3:58 AM on Sep. 1, 2010

  • Yes I have advice. WAKE UP and REALIZE YOUR OWN SELF WORTH. WHY are you investing your "LOVE" in this loser? why do you value yourself SO LITTLE?
    sati769leigh

    Answer by sati769leigh at 6:48 AM on Sep. 1, 2010

  • Do not take your ex back....my ex cheated on me too after 8 years I finally got rid of him....I just started talking to another guy and it is VERY hard to trust him like I am so scared he is cheating already just cause he don't text back sometimes which he prob isn't but my ex just made me not be able to trust anymore IDK what to do or feel I am sorry for you too but WE don't need the bad/mean guys...
    Shannon706

    Answer by Shannon706 at 8:29 AM on Sep. 1, 2010

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