Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

How does it feel to be useless?!?

Where to begin?....Me and my Bf and now father of my unborn child couldn't have been happier when we 1st met.We spent every moment together and fell in love immediately, but as of lately he seems to have done a complete 360.He use to be the type of guy who you couldn't keep off of you but now its like I have to force any type of affection.We've had arguements and a few problems but none too serious.I love him more than I love myself at times and I give him everything emotionally and physically.I just don't understand what happened its like everyday his love fades more and more and I'm scared I'll lose him for good.We were suppose to start a family and live "happily ever after!"WTF?Some of my close friends think he's cheating but I hate to assume with no facts or proof.I just need a little advice...Feel free!

Answer Question
 
Sarah0306

Asked by Sarah0306 at 7:28 PM on Oct. 11, 2008 in Pregnancy

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • Oh and he works 2nd shift and sometimes works random "overtimes" that I sometimes question.Or he stayd gone for hours with friends when he tells me he'll be "right back".I don't want to overreact or make something out of nothing but I know I'm not wrong for feeling the way I do at this point.
    Sarah0306

    Answer by Sarah0306 at 7:35 PM on Oct. 11, 2008

  • you just posted another question about this....kind of the same thing if you're looking for answers.... men, (all men), take things differently than women. He may just need some time to come to grips. depending on how far along you are, he may not have had much time to evaluate all that's going on. you really need to talk to him. Things kept in the dark only get worse. Include him....chances are he's thinking about his job and the money you both make, whether or not that will make your family comfortable, or whether or not he'll live up to being a good dad....
    talk to him, things will work out.
    Adeline1210

    Answer by Adeline1210 at 7:35 PM on Oct. 11, 2008

  • I agree. Also, don't let that "seed of doubt" fester and grow within you. This will definately put a rift between you two.
    OldrWizrMom

    Answer by OldrWizrMom at 7:54 PM on Oct. 11, 2008

  • From my own experience, a first time dad that isn't married sometimes freaks out, and they don't want to tell anyone. My husband (boyfriend at the time) was super freaked out all the time when I was pregnant. We weren't married, we didn't have good jobs, we had a roommate in our apartment...we just weren't READY to have a kid at all!

    Plus, I used to bitch at him constantly, probably from hormones. Who loves a bitchy chick LOL!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:55 PM on Oct. 11, 2008

  • Having a baby is a HUGE deal and maybe he is not sure how to react to it yet so he is pulling himself emotionally from you. I really do not know. I wish you luck and hope that things work out for the best for you 3.
    vickwu

    Answer by vickwu at 8:31 PM on Oct. 11, 2008

  • This is to the anonymous reply.OMG that is like our exact situation and I never thought those things played into it but now that u mention it...His friend is staying in our spare room and doesn't pay any bills and eats up the groceries I buy and brings home random women daily.I've mentioned it to him and he blows it off.We both have pretty good jobs.(He's a correctional officer and I work at a daycare) so money isn't the main issue but it does come up occassionally.I believe we are ready for a baby he's just taken back like most of you have said.Thanks though your replies have helped!I'll have a talk with him ASAP!
    Sarah0306

    Answer by Sarah0306 at 8:41 PM on Oct. 11, 2008

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.