Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

2 Bumps

when you got pregnant

did all your friends vanish? sadly mine did. its pathedic! the only people I talk to are my husbands friends and their wifes but cant really call them friends. and to make things more aggravating is they have kids too! i hung out with them kids or not but its such a burden for them to even call me! : /

Answer Question
 
Kayge

Asked by Kayge at 10:30 AM on Sep. 1, 2010 in Just for Fun

Level 9 (366 Credits)
Answers (12)
  • Most of em.. but the ones that were/are true.. stuck around!
    SuperrMommyy

    Answer by SuperrMommyy at 10:31 AM on Sep. 1, 2010

  • well I had just moved to a new town when I discovered I was pregnant, so no I didnt lose any, I gained some from my pregnancy group.
    cassie_kellison

    Answer by cassie_kellison at 10:34 AM on Sep. 1, 2010

  • When I got pregnant, my friends were still there but I noticed a difference in how often we all spoke. They all made it seem like they couldn't wait for my daughter to get here. They made it seem like there were going to be there for me. After my daughter was born, I spoke to them maybe once every few weeks. Now we don't speak at all. I got pregnant at 18 and had my daughter at 19. I am 21 now and can't really say that I have any true friends. I spend my time with my daughter and my husband. I have tried making friends with my husband's friends and their significant others, but I just don't click with them... and I also get the feeling that a majority of them don't like me. So that doesn't help. I've basically given up on finding any friends. I figure when my daughter starts school and I get a job, that will be my opportunity to get out there and make new friends!
    poptart0325

    Answer by poptart0325 at 10:35 AM on Sep. 1, 2010

  • I did lose friends, but then again were they really friends? Nope.. It took awhile for that to sink in and for the hurt to go away. I found things to do to keep myself busy and eventually found new friends who were also moms too. women that i had something in common with. I am sorry that that has happened to you but try to look on the positive side of it and not get too stuck in the negative.. I bet those other women who are your husbands friends will end up being true friends in the end.
    BobbieJo286

    Answer by BobbieJo286 at 10:36 AM on Sep. 1, 2010

  • That stinks! I can't imagine why the sudden drop in friendship w/ those that have kids. I know I don't get to see my friends as much as I'd like to since kids, husb. work, the house- yada yada- keep me so busy. Perhaps they are just busy- and the timing just seems to have coincided w/ your pregnancy. Don't give up hope. Call them like once a week to just chat, ask ques. or make a date for a girl's nite out. If they keep turning you down, or cutting the conversation short, then you will have to hang on to the ones who still make time for the friendship. The rest can still be on your Christmas Card list- so they know you still care- & the door's still open. Good luck w/ everything!
    mrsmom110

    Answer by mrsmom110 at 10:36 AM on Sep. 1, 2010

  • I lost a few, but not too many. I have a small group of close friends, and even the ones without kids still call me to talk, or invite me AND my kids out for lunch/dinner. Maybe you should try joining a playgroup or something and make some new ones.=) GL!
    SheIsMySunrise

    Answer by SheIsMySunrise at 10:37 AM on Sep. 1, 2010

  • No, I was one of the last of my friends to have babies! The only one who doesnt have one is my ds God mother!
    mum-to-a-cutie

    Answer by mum-to-a-cutie at 10:51 AM on Sep. 1, 2010

  • Yes because I was 19 and they all were in college and bar hopping. But it all evens out.
    salexander

    Answer by salexander at 11:28 AM on Sep. 1, 2010

  • Yes, all but a couple... Though I had my DD when I was 16, so it was expected. The friends that stuck around I am still close to now. Funny enough, that cycle repeated with each of my pregnancies though. People assumed that because I was pregnant I wouldn't enjoy going out, or be able to do normal things (like ride a bike, camp, go jogging- though I kept up my normal activities, they were simply unaware of what a pregnant woman can truly do).
    ObbyDobbie

    Answer by ObbyDobbie at 11:35 AM on Sep. 1, 2010

  • What I realized is that your true friends will stand by your side no matter what. It is a hard realization, but it is oh so true. You don't have to necessarily make friend's with your husband's friends' wives, just be acquaintances like it was before. You will make friends that will last a lifetime. Good luck.
    christy_lvr

    Answer by christy_lvr at 11:36 AM on Sep. 1, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.