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4 Bumps

If DH spends large amount of money on himself is it fair that you can do the same?

We are JUST getting by w/ bill and everything else. We recieved $2,100. dollars for a gas lease and my husband is using $2,000 for a bear hunting trip into another state w/ his boss and friends.
I'm I wrong in feeling like what do I get? I feel guilty for buying myself a pair of sneakers when the others are worn out...
I know he busts his butt at physical labor 40+ hrs a week and I'm a sahm, but I still feel that it is totally unfair.
I can't even go to the grocery store by myself let alone away for the day or week....
Would you feel the same?


Asked by cuteasabutton78 at 12:48 PM on Sep. 1, 2010 in Relationships

Level 8 (240 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (11)
  • I think that it is childish that he is spending the money on a bear hunting trip instead of putting it into the things that the family needs. It doesn't seem fair that he is thinking of himself and not his family. Do not feel bad for being a SAHM. That isobviously a decision you guys made together and he needs to make sure that his family is taken care of.

    Answer by hsmominky at 12:56 PM on Sep. 1, 2010

  • I think your DH is making a poor choice. If you are just getting by then That money should have been used for what will help the family out. Not who gets what.

    Answer by Iluvmy5 at 12:52 PM on Sep. 1, 2010

  • Two wrongs don't make a right.
    Oh, and your husband is a tool.

    Answer by Fistandantalus at 1:06 PM on Sep. 1, 2010

  • I don't think you should go with a "he gets to spend money, I should too" thing. Instead, focus on this thing he is doing. He is blowing that money when it is obvious that you guys need it! He should NOT be going on that trip! He is a husband and a father, he needs to put his family before anything else. Using it to go on this trip would be selfish and cruel to your financial situation!

    Answer by an-apple-a-day at 12:53 PM on Sep. 1, 2010

  • Wow..I would be super mad.. I think if he wants to spend money on a fun trip..then the family should go.. not just himself and his friends.

    Answer by SuperrMommyy at 12:56 PM on Sep. 1, 2010

  • ditto everyone else, if the trip is that expensive he shouldn't be going on it. if it were between taking 1/2 the 'extra' money and going on a little vacay by himself(with his boss/friends) then that wouldn't be so bad but the other 1/2 should be in savings or to help get ahead in bills or whatever. to use ALL of it for a stupid hunting trip is crazy. i'm sorry, i know how you feel about not buying anything for yourself and feeling guilty that you don't bring in $$ for household expenses but i think your husband is being selfish with this money :-/

    Answer by DreainCO at 12:59 PM on Sep. 1, 2010

  • I agree with Iluvmy5

    Answer by noahsmommy12908 at 12:58 PM on Sep. 1, 2010

  • That is just plain stupid on his part and did u argue about the fact that u are bearly making it????

    Answer by mommaofemma at 1:39 PM on Sep. 1, 2010

  • He understands where I'm coming from and why I'm upset but he already put down a deposit months ago. I know he feels bad but that still doesn't make it right. Ha, this is the best part- He told me when he gets back I can go to a spa and get my hair styled and nails done, etc. What makes that funny is that is totally not me at all!!! Besides my SIL owns a salon- I can get that stuff done free- why spend more money stupidly, lol.

    Comment by cuteasabutton78 (original poster) at 1:52 PM on Sep. 1, 2010

  • That type of spending would NOT go over in my house! Both hubs and I work, and we agree that the kids and household expenses come first-- and if there is any money left over for 'fun' we put it aside and for family spending-- like on a "family fun day" -- where we ALL get out of the house and we ALL go do something fun--- this past "fun day" we took the kids to Wisconsin Dells for the day and had a blast!
    I think your husband needs to put the household first- (bills, kids, expenses) and save the bear hunting for another time... when you can afford it. And no, I don't think 2 wrongs make a right, I would not go out and spend, spend, spend just to get back at him because he spent that much on himself. I think he should cancel the trip, get back what $ he can and put the rest to the household expenses and put some aside to use on something for EVERYONE not just himself!

    Answer by MizLee at 2:08 PM on Sep. 1, 2010