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Need reassurance

My dh is gone. We haven't gotten along in a while. He has this hostility towards me since I started school. I work full time and go to school 4 nights a week. I never do anything to him. I have auctually been going out of my way to not piss him off. But the short temper and evil looks are still there. He has cheated on me 3 times in 10 years of marriage. And he gets pissed because I go to school and aren't home enough. I came in, paused the TV (don't you love DVR) and asked him calmly for the 10th time this week what the problem was. con't......

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:09 PM on Oct. 11, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (11)
  • He gives me this evil, i'm sick of you look and says "nothing". After a couple other little things of him blowing me off, I said fine, I want a divorce. He says get your crap and get out of my house. I said of hell no. I have the 2 kids, I will be keeping the house. He proceeds to tell me he isn't leaving. Some more crap, he finally said all pissy like "if you want me to leave i'll leave" I said "leave". He gets up stomping around and say i'm probably screwing someone else anyway, i'm a slut, whore bitch. I said oh where would I have time for this? At school. I'm so over it. I'm not even mad. just over it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:12 PM on Oct. 11, 2008

  • you don't need a relationship like that! good for you for telling him to leave!
    flutterfae

    Answer by flutterfae at 11:14 PM on Oct. 11, 2008

  • You're being emotionally blackmailed! This is a form of abuse, a means of controlling you. He probably feels threatened by you impowering yourself with an education. Keep going and do not let his tactics work. You'll be sorry if you give in! All the best!
    Lexylex

    Answer by Lexylex at 11:15 PM on Oct. 11, 2008

  • Good, let him go...who needs that crap anyway? I dealt with a control freak for a long time, and it wasn't fun! In the long run, I think you will be much better off without him! You should not have to feel bad for trying to better YOURSELF!!! Good for you!
    mama14572

    Answer by mama14572 at 11:18 PM on Oct. 11, 2008

  • A cheating man usually blames his wife for cheating. THAT is what his problem is with you. It's obvious because your gone all the time...He's jealous and suspicious of YOU because HE has CHEATED.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:42 PM on Oct. 11, 2008

  • Sounds like you know what to do,your doing it ! You will be Ok baby. If you had a dog and it was gone one day you would muss it but you will survive! Try this trick my grandmother tought me. Its called the 30 day forget him trick. Go 30 days with out talking to him or seeing him. Keep count . If you slip start over. I promise before you get to thirty you will lose track and it won't hurt so much. then girl you are on your way. try it it works even after 30 years of being with the same man!
    biggmama40

    Answer by biggmama40 at 12:24 AM on Oct. 12, 2008

  • GOOD FOR YOU! You are clearly on the way to a better future. Kudos for letting him know right off that you will be keeping the house. I wish you the best, particularly while you finish school and you and the kiddos adjust to the situation.
    SoBeSueB

    Answer by SoBeSueB at 12:42 AM on Oct. 12, 2008

  • i am glad you are doing something good for yourself and stay strong! if you are keeping a bad one, then it is better to not have one.
    yoshiki56

    Answer by yoshiki56 at 2:27 AM on Oct. 12, 2008

  • Sounds like you just need to make a decision to file the divorce. You sound a lot like me when I knew I was done. It's funny the similarities, the verbal abuse, controlling, and also during my 10th yr of marriage. Good luck. Don't expect him to be cooperative in any way. Stay strong!
    hopelessnance

    Answer by hopelessnance at 2:52 AM on Oct. 12, 2008

  • If he's accusing you of cheating and you aren't, he definitely is cheating on you! I'm very sorry! I'm glad you're sticking up for yourself and bettering yourself in school.
    shmorris56

    Answer by shmorris56 at 4:34 AM on Oct. 12, 2008

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