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2 Bumps

You know that saying...Don't tell me how to raise my kid, and I won't tell you what's wrong with yours!

In general I live by this rule. I think everyone is differnet & that just because it works for one kid doesn't mean it will work for another. With that said...My bff & her daughter are part of our everyday life. She is a single mom, and she is a dedicated mom! When it comes to parenting we are not two peas in the pod. She is having lots of issues with her daughter. I try to avoid the subject of parenting skills because she is sensitive on this. On rare occasions I have made my position/views known. But I get irked quickly because, I find that she, like her daughter, pushes blame on others. She doesn't hold her daughter accountable & has an excuse for everything. But then wonders why she has so much issues with her daughter.
I really don't know the best way to handle this! Every year it gets worse. I love both of them but it effects me and my daughter. What would be a good way to handle this?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 1:35 AM on Sep. 2, 2010 in General Parenting

Answers (5)
  • I was in this situation a few years ago and honestly I finally had to walk away. I helped in every way i could, did everything that was asked of me and i was repaid with her child stealing from me. My DH and I finally hit our limit and walked away. I did everything I could to keep one of her children in school and out of the alt. HS program. At the end of last year I was driving by the alt HS and there he was, it was so sad to me that his mothers choice along with his own and her lack of parenting led him down that road. I was also glad that i had walked away and didnt have to worry about my children seeing her son as an example to follow.

    Sometimes there is nothing you can do or say that will change anything.

    Answer by 3_ring_circus_ at 1:40 AM on Sep. 2, 2010

  • i just wouldnt be her friend anymore... or i would just stop hangin aroun as much with them

    Answer by Patientchild3 at 1:40 AM on Sep. 2, 2010

  • I must say if you are really good friends then you should be able to talk to her about this. I would try and tell her how to parent I would explain why this is affecting you. I also agree that everyone has different parenting styles and that what works for one does not always work for others. With that said, I have learned a lot from the friends that I have and we are always helping each other in saome way. She may not want you advice ot even take it. So you have to figure out, is this friendship worth saving and if so then how do you go about that.

    You can not control her child and you need to do what is best for you. As I said before I would talk to her about how this is affecting you and your DD. Listen to what she has to say and see if you can come to some agreement.

    Good Luck!

    Answer by cornflakegirl3 at 2:10 AM on Sep. 2, 2010

  • If she is in your home, she needs to follow your rules...plain and simple

    Answer by JoLee12345 at 8:06 AM on Sep. 2, 2010

  • If it's affecting you and your dd that much I think it's time for her to move out.

    Answer by musicmom08 at 7:30 PM on Sep. 3, 2010

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