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If your son lost his playstation/computer privileges and he had a friend sleep over would you allow him to play the playstation?

He lost his privileges because he has a nasty habit of scaring his brothers and sisters? Two of which are a 22 month old and a 2 month old. I allowed him to play one night and told him he wasn't allowed to play anymore, but he asked his dad even though I already told him no. I gave in because I didn't want to look like the evil mom.

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Amandacintron

Asked by Amandacintron at 10:32 AM on Oct. 12, 2008 in Tweens (9-12)

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Answers (28)
  • No, absolutely not. You are setting yourself up for a lot of problems in the years to come by giving in like this.
    SamanthaAgain

    Answer by SamanthaAgain at 10:33 AM on Oct. 12, 2008

  • Talk to your hubby and tell him that if the two of you don't display a united front when it comes to discipline, you'll be facing a very disrespectful son in the future. Let your "no" mean "no" - stand your ground. I'm sure he can find tons of other things to do around the house.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:57 AM on Oct. 12, 2008

  • If you took away a privlidge because he can't listen maybe you shouldn't reward him by letting his friends sleep over??
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:57 AM on Oct. 12, 2008

  • Yeah, I would not let him have sleepover either. Stick to your guns.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:14 AM on Oct. 12, 2008

  • I wouldn't have let them kid sleep over...but if you give in...and I do it sometimes...I still wouldn't let him play regardless. I don't care if the Pope came to my house and asked my son to play a game on the xbox...I would tell him sorry he's in trouble and not allowed to play.
    raybell

    Answer by raybell at 11:23 AM on Oct. 12, 2008

  • Trust me I agree with every one of you all. The thing is that this is my oldest and he is a stepson. I feel his dad lets him get by with more because he saw a lot when he was a kid with his mom and dad fighting. I still think it isn't fair to everyone else in the house. We have 5 all together. I feel like you should be equal all around. Don't try telling that to my hubby though. Not that he is a terrible and mean hubby it is just one thing we don't agree on.
    Amandacintron

    Answer by Amandacintron at 11:24 AM on Oct. 12, 2008

  • Are you or your husband modelling mean behavior toward the babies or toward him or each other for him to imitate? Frankly, if I felt my son was unable to relate to the feelings of family members so obviously in need of caring behavior, I would directly blame xbox and other screen influences in his environment. We had a third baby when our sons were 8 and 9, and we carefully read Siblings Without Rivalry to make sure we didn't create bad feelings toward the new little invader of their world. (Too bad we had not read it when THEY were babies, but it worked well ... cont'd ...
    waldorfmom

    Answer by waldorfmom at 12:16 PM on Oct. 12, 2008

  • for their relating to the 3rd, and we applied the book's ideas from then on) They all grew up kind to each other. Mean behavior like you describe is NOT at all normal. It is learned or is a cry of anguish. Find real-world fun to phase out screen time (xbox/computer/tv) and get RID of it. It really is ok to make playing an instrument and belonging to a youth orchestra; AND belonging to Scouts or Fire Department Explorers; AND working to help the neighbors rake or mow their yards; AND being part of a sports team most of the year (although be careful about the attitudes he gets exposed to, soccer coaches for instance can promote a meanness not appropriate until college age) - these can be as taken-for-granted a part of growing up as learning math. These involvements foster noble qualities. Ooh ooh, AND horses or 4-H or bird rescue ... Best wishes !
    waldorfmom

    Answer by waldorfmom at 12:28 PM on Oct. 12, 2008

  • I would definitely not give in. I actually would not have allowed him to have company either. I would let him know that he was given directives in regards to not scaring his sisters. He made a choice to disobey. There are consequences for wrong choices and he would have to pay. It hurts me to have to discipline my daughter but I also know it will save me some headaches when those pre-teen/teenage years come. By then, she will definitely know that I don't play and have 0% tolerance for disobedience and disrespectfulness.
    delight0757

    Answer by delight0757 at 1:09 PM on Oct. 12, 2008

  • why would he be allowed to have a friend over if he isnt behaving enough to have his playstation/computer??
    rockingrobin

    Answer by rockingrobin at 1:10 PM on Oct. 12, 2008

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