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3 Bumps

sry this is a wierd 1

ok let me ask u this: if u were planning on moving to another state w/ ur husband and kids but u and ur husband werent getting a lot very well and u have ur doubts about staying neway, and u really dont wanna move to begain w/ and out of nowhere u get offered a job working somewhere ud love to work, after u'd been looking fr over a year now, and the past 2 days ive been asking God for someting to happen so that we didnt have to move. what do u make of this , is this my sign or am i just over thinking it? and by the way my husband said no that i cant take the job, i mean we (he) is making plans to move out of state shouldnt we take all the money we can get?i just dont know waht to make of this.

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mamasmurf171

Asked by mamasmurf171 at 3:08 PM on Sep. 2, 2010 in Money & Work

Level 13 (973 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • Ok, so does he have a job in this other state that your moving to? Because if he does then you go. You make it work and you work on your marriage. Because your kids are important. HOWEVER, if there is no job, you tell him about your job offer and see what he says. If he says no, you ask him why.
    Possible over thinkage but go with your gut! Good luck
    browningmom

    Answer by browningmom at 3:10 PM on Sep. 2, 2010

  • I think that this is something you have to decide for yourself. As a mother, you have to make the best decision for you and your children. If you and your spouse are not getting along, is this affecting your children? Have you and your husband tried seeing a counselor? This is a pretty big issue and I think it should be worked out before you move.
    genuinelyblessd

    Answer by genuinelyblessd at 3:11 PM on Sep. 2, 2010

  • If you have doubts about your relationship then speak to him about it and if he is unwilling to allow you to make decisions about your own life then I would say your doubts are more than likely accurate. Go with your gut and your heart. It sure sounds like a sign to me.
    Memigen

    Answer by Memigen at 3:14 PM on Sep. 2, 2010

  • If you are planning on leaving him. I say take the job. And tell him you are taking the job know matter what.
    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 3:18 PM on Sep. 2, 2010

  • he did tell me that i could not take the job then again he tellings me everything, its like im not allowed to decide for myself, like yesterday we were talking about something and he said yea i already have ur car picked out and i said "do i not get a say in this?" and all he said was i know what u like and he totally didnt get my point
    mamasmurf171

    Comment by mamasmurf171 (original poster) at 3:27 PM on Sep. 2, 2010

  • If you're doubting whether you want to stay with this man and you don't want to move, then now sounds like the perfect time to seperate. Either as a trial run or for good.
    HotMama330

    Answer by HotMama330 at 3:59 PM on Sep. 2, 2010

  • Honey I would not move with that man. My dh would never make a decision with out me, we are a team. Even though he knows what I like I still get an input.
    Sounds like your DH needs to wake up and smell the coffee. Your an adult and can make decisions too. You guys need to go to counselling, and if he doesnt want to he can move by himself. You not a door mat, your a beautiful vase with rare roses in it and deserve to be treated like one.
    browningmom

    Answer by browningmom at 5:24 PM on Sep. 2, 2010

  • he says counselling is well stupid and hes not goin to go and let some1 who doesnt even know us tel us what we should do trust me ive tried but he just wont do it and now they wanna move in october next freakin month
    mamasmurf171

    Comment by mamasmurf171 (original poster) at 5:30 PM on Sep. 2, 2010

  • OP--YOU have to decide what YOU are willing to put up with!! Do you want to continue to live with a CONTROL freak? Or do you want to stand on your own two feet?! If you're not happy, moving to some new city--presumably where you don't know anyone, have no job, and getting around may be difficult, sounds like more controlling behavior from your husband.

    I think you know the answer in your heart, but you're not quite ready to make a stand. You need to look at your future 1, 5, 10 years from now. How do you envision your life? Can you expect to be reasonably happy? What about your children?

    Everyone has a breaking point. When you reach yours, you will know what to do!!
    LoriKeet

    Answer by LoriKeet at 7:15 PM on Sep. 2, 2010

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