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in-law ?

I have been with my dh for over 4 years and married for two of them. So, why is it my in-laws still think it acceptable to plan my sds b-day party. This is not the first time they have done this sort of things. They litetally almost ruined my wedding. My mil calls to tell me tonight that my sil had picked out the date, place, and time of my sds b-day without a mention to my dh or myself. She even invited people. To top it off dh and I with sds help have already planned it, just haven't sent the invites yet. How would you handle this situation? I mean dh and I do not want to start a hugr fight but enough is enough. I basically told dh to grow a set and put them in their place. His child his responsibility not theirs. Please help. They are driving me nuts.


Asked by katcb1019 at 11:07 PM on Sep. 2, 2010 in Relationships

Level 15 (2,035 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (6)
  • If he will not talk to his family, you will have to. Just let them know that you have made arrangements and plan on doing so in the future too. Maybe let them know that you would loved for them to be involved as long as they realize you have the final say and they run it by you first for final approval. They should not be allowed to make plans for your child w/o talking to you and your DH first.


    Answer by SylviaNCali at 3:29 AM on Sep. 3, 2010

  • I would tell them that Sd and you have already planned it and that their efforts were nice but you would like this to be an inner-family decision.

    Answer by Jademom07 at 11:08 PM on Sep. 2, 2010

  • Yikes, that's tough! I hope that your DH handles this, IMHO he needs to be the one to set boundaries with his family.

    Answer by blessedwithree at 11:09 PM on Sep. 2, 2010

  • I would say, "Oh, sorry. We already have plans for their bday party. You will just have to let everyone you invited know."

    Answer by Kword at 11:11 PM on Sep. 2, 2010

  • Yeah I agree with Kword. You step up. Otherwise try to be nice and say thanks for taking over my life.

    Answer by mmmegan38 at 11:17 PM on Sep. 2, 2010

  • In all honesty, it is Dh's responsibility to grow a pair and deal with it. His parents, his daughter. But yeah, he should be the one to say something. Totally leaves you off the trail of being 'overbearing' or 'overstepping'.

    Answer by midnightshadow2 at 11:55 PM on Sep. 2, 2010