Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

3 Bumps

would you lie to your husband and pretend to be in love to spare his feelings because he's so in love with you

last night my husband and i learned that his parents are divorcing. they seemed like the perfect couple. in fact thats what his dad thought. his mom told him that she wasn't in love with him anymore and that she felt that way for years. what doesn't make sense is just 2 days ago she was telling him how much she was in love with him and how lucky she was to have him. my FIL is a fantastic man and he's completely broken now. he's been crying non stop and been saying that he can't go on without her and he doesn't understand how she just stopped loving him but the reality is she pretended to love him and she did it well. whats tragic is they have 6 kids. 2 are grown, 3 teens, and a 5 year old. i feel like if she stopped loving him a long time ago she should have left then because all she did was postpone the hurt and hurt him more because she lied for years. would you hurt your husband that badly by lying to him for years?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 11:13 PM on Sep. 2, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (22)
  • No, I wouldn't.

    Answer by LovingSAHMommy at 11:13 PM on Sep. 2, 2010

  • Well I have no idea why she would do that. I am sure there must have been some signs that she wasn't happy. I do not think things just come up out of the blue clear sky.

    Answer by mmmegan38 at 11:15 PM on Sep. 2, 2010

  • No

    Answer by tryin2BGOOD at 11:15 PM on Sep. 2, 2010

  • A lot of people stay together for the children, but you can only do that for so long. You can only be there if they need a should to cry on. My parents, that have been married for over 26 years, are seperating. It happens...........nothing that I can do about it.


    Answer by elly25 at 11:16 PM on Sep. 2, 2010

  • No, I would not lie to him and pretend.

    My Mom pulled the whole "I stayed for you kids" thing a zillion times after my Dad found out about her cheating. It only made our life more miserable because they were fake/fighting and just not happy.

    Answer by hsmominky at 11:18 PM on Sep. 2, 2010

  • No I couldn't pretend to love someone...that's probably why I'm still single. I got tired of looking out for everyone elses feelings and started putting myself 2nd (of course my son is 1st) but if i'm not happy I don't prolong anything. It only makes it harder in the end

    Answer by onemellowmom at 11:20 PM on Sep. 2, 2010

  • No, even though you don't love that person anymore you should still have some respect for them, I would tell him how I felt.

    Answer by sheloveearth at 11:20 PM on Sep. 2, 2010

  • I stay together with my son's dad because it is best for my son...we do not argue or anything but we just are together for his would I go spitting out more I would not so I have to question why a woman says she doesn't love her husband but keeps having kids...maybe she is just bored and doesn't realize it and thinks it is more of being out of love..IDK...then again I have a friend who's parents divorced after 38 yrs of again IDK

    Answer by wheresthewayout at 11:20 PM on Sep. 2, 2010

  • No.I wouldn't do that.
    But maybe she is confused and thinks love should be all kinds of fireworks and excitement and flowers and candy and champagne ??? In other words, she is being unrealistic? She might be going through menopause and losing her mnd? Some women really go nuts. This is wierd.She needs to see a counselor. Good luck!

    Answer by gertie41 at 11:25 PM on Sep. 2, 2010

  • nope i think thats wrong

    Answer by 3boyzcrazy at 11:25 PM on Sep. 2, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.