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Going to have kids 13months apart. How can I handle day-to-day life without losing my mind??

Mu husband of four years and I just found out recently that we are pregnant... AGAIN!! We are happy with the life we have now, the two of us and our adorable six month old son. What tips and advice can I get from those who've been there?! I just can't even comprehend how I will manage to take care of both babies and be a good mom to both.

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FrazzledMomOf2

Asked by FrazzledMomOf2 at 11:58 AM on Sep. 3, 2010 in Babies (0-12 months)

Level 2 (7 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • You take it one day at a time. Yes there will be days are overwhelming. I have never had mine that close but still having more then one can make things different. Things will fall into place and remember to take breaks if you need it and ask for help.
    Raeann11

    Answer by Raeann11 at 12:00 PM on Sep. 3, 2010

  • My first suggestion would be to definitely get a sling (or two, or three!). I didn't have kids that close together and I can only imagine how hard it will be. I'd be terrified to have a newborn right now and my baby is 17 months! My mom did it, though, and lot's of women do... so it can be done! Hopefully you get some good answers!
    LeanneC

    Answer by LeanneC at 12:00 PM on Sep. 3, 2010

  • Get a good sling or wrap. Breastfeed the baby and wear the baby. Have the house organized and childproofed before the baby is born. Read parenting toddler books like Love & Limits by Elizabeth Crary now so you are ready. Become involve in a moms group so you have mom friends.

    Gailll

    Answer by Gailll at 12:03 PM on Sep. 3, 2010

  • I had the same doubts. My kids are 12 months and a week apart. It was very stressful at first but it gets better. They are the best of friends now (6months later)
    Get into a routine as soon as you can. You need support from you husband and family/friends. Try to get your older child sleeping though the night, it will make a big difference.(mine didn't sleep through the night till my youngest was a week old).
    I ALWAYS get up before my oldest in the morning. Even if I only get to poor my coffee it makes a difference to have a minute to yourself before they attack..haha.
    Sleep in the afternoons when they take their nap and try to get an evening to yourself once a week.
    Good luck!
    tobys.mommy

    Answer by tobys.mommy at 12:04 PM on Sep. 3, 2010

  • Mine are 12 months and 2 weeks apart and the hardest thing for me was taking care of a baby while pregnant!
    Patience909

    Answer by Patience909 at 12:11 PM on Sep. 3, 2010

  • My boys are 13 months apart. They are now 4 and 5. They are very close, but I will admit, things like leaving the house became a real challenge. Get organized, get help if you can! I had to have a c-section, so my friend came and stayed with me. I also have older daughters and I would have been lost without them. Just don't be afraid to ask for help when you need it. I hope you have an involved father for your children...this will go a long way.
    salexander

    Answer by salexander at 12:19 PM on Sep. 3, 2010

  • My first two are 13 months apart. My third will be 15 months apart from my youngest when he/she is born.
    My first piece of advice is .. It is only as hard as you make it out to be.
    You're only one person, not everything needs to be handled on once or even in one day.
    It is okay that one cries/fusses while you're taking care of another. Neither of them will be mentally scarred or damaged in any way by having to wait even when they're upset.
    If you're formula feeding then prepare the bottles you'll be needing throughout the night before you go to bed. Same if you're pumping and bottle feeding breastmilk. I'll save you time and energy.
    Don't be afraid to ask for help when you need it. Make sure Dh/SO knows that you WILL need his help more around the house and with the kids. Double teaming duties is soo much easier then going at it alone.
    JazzlikeMraz

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 12:49 PM on Sep. 3, 2010

  • Leaving the house was easy for me. You just have to prepare yourself. Keep a bag in the car at all times of extra diapers, an extra outfit (remember to change out the outfit as the kids grow), diapering supplies, etc. That way you're not having to pack a bag everytime you go out for a couple of hours. It'll be easier when you have to go on day trips too, because you'll just have to pack the extras and go. Change both kids right before you leave anywhere. If it's a long drive then I always go right before nap time, so they're rested when we arrive. If it's a short trip then go after lunch and after nap time. When grocery shopping wear baby in a sling. I suggest a no sew sling, because they're more comfortable and fit baby a lot better then the store bought ones. Wearing baby while shopping saves you from having two carts and/or putting baby in the basket of the car and losing grocery space.
    JazzlikeMraz

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 12:52 PM on Sep. 3, 2010

  • It's not as hard as people think it is. I have kids 15 months and 13 months apart right in a row (the oldest was 2 years, 4 months when the 3rd was born). It helped that I encouraged my kids to be independent from a young age. The older kids didn't need me to constantly entertain them. They liked playing alone with their toys or with each other while I was busy with the baby. I also made them help. they helped clean up their messes and helped with the baby (usually bringing me things and taking dirty diapers to the trash). When it was time to change/dress them I did it assembly line style. Got all their clothes, diapers, etc and changed them one after the other on the living room floor.
    The only thing I didn't do was go anywhere alone with them for a long, long time. It was a logistical nightmare that I couldn't handle. They are 10, almost 9 and almost 8 now and I wouldn't want it any other way.
    justanotherjen

    Answer by justanotherjen at 1:49 PM on Sep. 3, 2010

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