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Two year old is doing naughty do I discipline her without spanking?

**Rolling eyes**

Ok here the deal: I'm a non-spanking mom of a two year old.

Lately she has been throwing parts of her lunch and eating utensils on the floor. Today she asked for more milk, and I told her to give me the bottle. She threw it at me and it hit the wall! I made her pick it up, and I told her sternly that that was NOT ok. But she acts like it's no big deal.

I try time out with her, but she doesn't seem to understand that it's a disciplinary tool. She likes to sit on her little "naughty" stool.

What can I do?

And for those of you that will say "See! She NEEDS a spanking!!", I disagree. She needs DISCIPLINE.


Asked by Anonymous at 3:10 PM on Sep. 3, 2010 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (14)
  • I would try instead of always making it a negative punishment try a positive one like when she threw her cup make her get it and say we use this to drink not throw can you try to hand it to me again so I can get you some more milk and see how that works. Stern voices and timeouts do NOT work with my daughter she just screams and either gets sad or even more mad so I tried the positive punishment and it is going great. You basically tell them what they CAN do instead of always what they CANT do... Hope it helps??

    Answer by ladybugky88 at 5:31 PM on Sep. 3, 2010

  • If she threw food, I'd end lunch. If she throws her cup, there would be no more to drink. Those would be natural consequences for those behaviors. And tell her why, each time, while putting her in time out. (I do time out the way that Raeann described)

    Answer by Gaccck at 3:16 PM on Sep. 3, 2010

  • Sorry but time outs work for my kids. I have the sit on the stool in the kitchen. Where there is nothing they can watch or play with. and they have to sit there for the min of the age they are.

    Answer by Raeann11 at 3:13 PM on Sep. 3, 2010

  • I dunno but I am in the same boat. My DD refuses to do what I ask and then tells me ' no. I not want to put it int he sink you put it in the sink. I go to time out!' Then she stomps off to the 3rd step. lol. I dunno how to argue with that. It's a constant battle of wills here and I swear the child can out smart me with he dumb logic.

    Answer by But_Mommie at 3:16 PM on Sep. 3, 2010

  • Try withholding things for punishment. Every child has their "currency" which are the most important things to them. Tell her it will be taken away if she does not listen.

    As for food throwing I think every child does it at one time or another and we used to end the meal if it started. We very calmly told them the meal was over if they were going to do that and then followed through. Good luck.

    Answer by elizabr at 3:51 PM on Sep. 3, 2010

  • She's two - its repetition and consistency that's going to win the battles I think. Like others have said if she throws the bottle, then she doesn't get the milk. I would take it a step further however and get down to her level and tell her its not okay to throw, hand her the bottle and tell her to hand it to you. Time out didn't work well for my kids it was funny to them, talking with them seemed to go farther. Each child is different though.

    Answer by blessedwboysx3 at 4:06 PM on Sep. 3, 2010

  • Take things away from her. And give her a chart to chart her actions. If she can make it through the week with more positive days than bad (maybe like give her a chart that has ten spots for the day - every truly bad -and not just a child being a child- action gets a sad face) then let her choose something from a treasure chest. Daycares use a tactic where they deter the child from the situation and have them focus on something else. If she acts up a lot in a short period of time tell her you will put up a sad face AND she can not play with her favorite toy until she begins to make mommy put smiley faces up or something.
    Help her to take pride in the good and to realize our bad actions have bad consequences.

    Good luck!

    Answer by Memigen at 3:15 PM on Sep. 3, 2010

  • And I would continue to use time outs also. As Raeann said, it is recommended for them to sit there for one minute per year of age. Two year old, two minutes. If she is closer to three, then three minutes.

    Answer by Memigen at 3:16 PM on Sep. 3, 2010

  • bottle?

    Answer by MommieOfOnly2 at 3:21 PM on Sep. 3, 2010

  • Use time out for 3 minutes and start taking her favorite toy away every time she doesn't listen, or whatever she has with her at the time.

    Answer by soccerfanatic13 at 3:32 PM on Sep. 3, 2010