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2 Bumps

Is a 13 yr old able to decide if he wants a haircut or not?

My 13 yr old son just had a haircut a month ago. He gels it and maintains somewhat of a "do". He thought it was too short so he's been letting it grow a bit. It's still short.

My husband, son's step dad, decides that all the boys are getting a cut today. My son came to me and said he didn't want one so I give him the advice to tell step daddy that he would prefer not to get one today. Horrible advice.

Wonderful hubby begins screaming at son and saying that him voicing his opinion on his own hair is being disrespectful. These two are driving me crazy. My husband is being an a$$.

Should my son have not spoken up? I need other points of view because right now my husband is looking like a monster to me.


Asked by Orionsgirl at 1:48 PM on Sep. 4, 2010 in Teens (13-17)

Level 31 (48,442 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (23)
  • Sounds like the REAL issue has NOTHING to do with hair.

    There is no reason a 13 yr old can not make some choices on his hair as long as they are not anti-social choices (weird colors, skin head, alternative cuts)


    Answer by sahlady at 3:49 PM on Sep. 4, 2010

  • At 13 he should be able to voice his opinion to whether or not he needs a haircut, especially if he just had one a month ago and it was shorter than usual. Daddy may need to chill a bit.

    Answer by QandA at 1:51 PM on Sep. 4, 2010

  • Its your sons head & his hair, hes old enough to say Hey I dont want a hair cut.

    My five year old chooses (until it gets too long & he starts looking like a girl)

    You hubby needs to relax. your sons 13 its his choice, his head. Now unless its against school rules or something. Let it go.

    Answer by lilmoosesmom at 1:50 PM on Sep. 4, 2010

  • I think he is at an age in which his individuality is being formed and that he should be able to say he doesn't want a haircut if he doesn't want one. I would tell your SO that your son's opinions should be respected. Choose your battles. It's just hair.

    Answer by LittleWeloosMom at 1:50 PM on Sep. 4, 2010

  • sounds like you need a new husband....

    I thought my step dad was crazy for always yelling at me over drinking the last little bit of soda out of a two liter he bought and yours is yelling at him over voicing an opinion?

    sounds like a dick and if that is such a big deal I would watch what else he gets on his case about... don't ignore issues that come up.. other wise you will have a shitty relationship when hes in his twenties like my mother and I.

    she never stood up for me when it came to stupid issues like this... because of it I hardly talk to her ...

    Answer by FITmama2B at 2:01 PM on Sep. 4, 2010

  • A 13 year old should be able to decide this unless it gets too long and unkempt. Talk it over with your husband

    Answer by elizabr at 1:52 PM on Sep. 4, 2010

  • Your son should definitely have the say-so on whether or not he wants a hair cut.
    IMO.. sounds like your hubby is being an a&#

    Answer by FeelinYummy at 1:54 PM on Sep. 4, 2010

  • if he doesnt start speaking up for him self now then he will be afraid to do so in the future. tell your husband its on his body its his choice. now body peircings and tattoos he doesnt have a say in until hes over 18.... at least. lol i was dying my hair when i was in 6th grade, it wasnt drastic but my dad let me cause its who my personality was

    Answer by pinkdena at 1:55 PM on Sep. 4, 2010

  • Your son isn't a baby. He is most certainly old enough to decide how he wants to wear his hair, and your husband was completely out of line by yelling at him for something so silly as hair. It is his head, let him do what he wants to do with it, there are much worse things that he could be doing!

    Answer by fallnangel93 at 1:56 PM on Sep. 4, 2010

  • I think 13 is old enough to decide. However, he probably could have worded it differently. Like asked his sd instead of telling him. I do agree with your husband that telling a grownup no is disrespectful but you also have to choose your battles

    Answer by BluDog at 1:53 PM on Sep. 4, 2010