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What would you do?

Last night my almost 7 yr old dd told me that my ex and his mom told her on her last visit to tell me not to talk to someone. Their next door neighbor was a girl I grew up with. DD said they told her to tell me if she calls not to answer because she just wants to tell lies on them. I am pretty ticked off right now. Where do they get off telling her to tell me something like that?

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treynlisa

Asked by treynlisa at 1:54 PM on Sep. 5, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 20 (9,618 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • I would just call them myself n let them know that if they need to give u a msg they need to call u themselves, we are all adulds here.thats what my dh told his ex because she was trying to have his dd back n forth w/msges
    gabby06

    Answer by gabby06 at 1:58 PM on Sep. 5, 2010

  • My first thought would be maybe your friend saw your ex doing something wrong and your ex is worried that she'll tell you what she saw?
    SarahLeeMorgan

    Answer by SarahLeeMorgan at 1:59 PM on Sep. 5, 2010

  • I agree with PP... why's he trying to cover for himself? Obviously, you'd probably trust a friend you grew up with over your EX... I mean, he's your ex for a reason, right? I would call him up and say that from now on, if he has something to say- say it directly to you and don't bring your little girl into it. That's childish and immature.
    SAHMomOf3

    Answer by SAHMomOf3 at 2:01 PM on Sep. 5, 2010

  • Let your daughter know that she isn't to get involved in that. That she doesn't need to be in the middle of whatever they're trying to hide. That if she feels something needs to be said to either parent then do so, but don't go around telling people gossip. Let your ex know that he is in the wrong for putting your daughter in the middle like that. Clearly he's trying to hide something from the other person.
    JazzlikeMraz

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 2:22 PM on Sep. 5, 2010

  • I agree with the other moms, he's hiding something, and he definitely should not be putting your daughter in the middle of it.
    RedRowan

    Answer by RedRowan at 7:59 PM on Sep. 5, 2010

  • Call him and ask why
    mommy_of_two388

    Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 8:40 PM on Sep. 5, 2010

  • You need to tell your daughter that next time she needs to tell her dad and whoever to tell you themselves and you need to call your ex and set things straight. Or ignore the whole thing completely and not entertain them.
    marchar2002

    Answer by marchar2002 at 9:40 PM on Sep. 5, 2010

  • Yeah dh and I agree that he must at least think this girl knows something he doesn't want told. DD was very strongly telling me not to talk to her. I have already told dd anytime someone tells her not to tell me something that is the first thing she should do. I am pretty ticked that they would use her to cover their behinds.
    treynlisa

    Comment by treynlisa (original poster) at 10:49 PM on Sep. 5, 2010

  • Definately ask them about this and talk to her. I mean if you trust her, let your child know this but of course she is going to have to respect her dad to a degree, too. Tough one : ( I'd encourage you to try and mend bridges if any need mended, so you and the exes can have a good friendship and hopefully drama like this would stop...
    txdaniella

    Answer by txdaniella at 1:04 AM on Sep. 6, 2010

  • lol, I'd be calling up the "don't call person" and asking for the dish. lol.

    honestly though, I'd call my ex and tell him not to use our child as a messenger, that if they had something to say, they could call me and discuss the issues like an adult!
    xxhazeldovexx

    Answer by xxhazeldovexx at 1:09 AM on Sep. 6, 2010

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