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would you confront them or leave it alone?

My neigbor we use to be friends then this one neighbor moved in and she started gossiping about me. She was telling them I had an affair on my DH and that I am an unfit mother, that I said one of our friends was a sex offender which all is lies. She said I let my kids hang out of the windows and let them drink out of gas cans. She told them she doesn't think we own a bath tub because my kids are dirty. She told the neighbor I never even met that I wasnted to kick her ass which I never said. She just said a bunch of gossip and lies about me. She appoligized a few days ago and I brought it up and she said no (name) said it I didn't say it. So I asked her yesterday and I actually believe she didn't say it that it was my neighbor. She said she would go with me to confront her about everything if I wanted because she didn't say that stuff that it was my neighbor. What do you think? CONT.......


Asked by mommy5409 at 8:18 AM on Sep. 6, 2010 in About CafeMom

Level 25 (22,258 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (11)
  • I think if I were you I'd take the ones who this new person is saying are gossiping about you and who have denied it and go speak to this woman. Look on it as an intervention. Obviously this woman craves drama. You don't have to be hostile but I would tell her you consider her behavior immature and unacceptable. Then I would keep away from her. We had the same problem with my bil and now we have nothing to do with him and we make sure everyone is aware that we don't. That way when he says anything about us they can ask how he would know when he never comes to the house or sees us.

    Answer by L.A.F.outloud at 12:24 PM on Sep. 6, 2010

  • I recently had a neighbor like that, she moved out this week, Thank God! She'd use me to make her girlfriend jealous over nothing (she is gay), she'd tell neighbors horrible things about me, and unfortunately I have to live here... but I personally took the higher road... left well enough alone and let her sit in her own crap? Honey, if she is spreading trash about you, it speaks more about her than you! Why start drama and get wrapped into the BS? Tell those who were told that she is simply being spiteful, and that you have no time for it?

    Answer by MommaClark3 at 8:34 AM on Sep. 6, 2010

  • she comes over in my yard trying to talk to me like nothing has happend and trying to be this friend to me and I can't let that go that easy. She even made up a fake email address using my real dads last name because she knows I want to meet them and I don'tr know have of them.

    Comment by mommy5409 (original poster) at 8:20 AM on Sep. 6, 2010

  • Distance yourself from the woman causing the drama... simply smile and walk away...

    Answer by MommaClark3 at 8:34 AM on Sep. 6, 2010

  • I think you should let it be, confronting her would just put you on her level. Yes, I know it bothers you but, just know that Karma is one heck of a woman, and she will get whats coming to her. As for your kids- so what if their a lil dirty? kids get dirty! doesn't mean you dont bathe them!!!! She obviously feels inferior to you, if she needs to say all these horrible things to you. Im sorry this happened, but she's not important, and was never a true friend. If she was, she would never have said anything like that. Im sure you are a wonderful mother!!! As for kids hanging out the windows- kids like to explore even if they dont know they could get hurt, i bet you 10/10 kids have done that, whether it was true in your case or not. One time i was babay sitting and 5 min after going to the bathroom i found the kids on the roof! doesn't mean Im a horrible person. Kids are made to adventure and explore- they're kids! Good Luck-

    Answer by Jachaismommie at 8:35 AM on Sep. 6, 2010

  • This person sounds a bit unstable- I would distance myself from her. The people who know you will not believe her lies & will see her for what she truly is- someone w/out a life & trying to create drama. You can't control what others say, only how you react (or dont react to them) Dont confront her- that's what she wants. Next time she tries to come over, make an excuse to get away & go back in the house. Good luck

    Answer by mrsmom110 at 8:41 AM on Sep. 6, 2010

  • let it be. She just wants the drama

    Answer by Jjoneslagrange at 8:42 AM on Sep. 6, 2010

  • yep, what goes around comes around. i had family talk about me like that! still do, i just don't talk to them and won't let them near my house.

    Answer by noel1978 at 8:46 AM on Sep. 6, 2010

  • Do not feed into the drama. It could end up making you look like the loon she says you are. Instead, live your life. It will soon become clear that what she has said about you is not true.

    Answer by layh41407 at 8:46 AM on Sep. 6, 2010

  • It sounds more like the new neighbor is more the problem. I mean, in your history as her (the one that was your friend first) friend, had there been any drama like this before? If not, it's likely the new neighbor. However, that said, I think I would leave both of them alone. I mean seriously, do you really NEED this drama in your life? People who really get to know you, and who get to know whoever the trouble maker is, will come to know the truth. The truth ALWAYS comes out. You're better served to be out of the way when the proverbial fecal matter hits the oscillator.


    Answer by JawgaMom1 at 8:55 AM on Sep. 6, 2010