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Should I change my son and I's last name?

Ok, backstory...
My ex named my son when he was born, a horrible name that I hated. Let's just say Bartholomew was involved. So, I changed my sons name to something that I loved (Jack) after my ex and I got divorced. When I divorced I kept my married name, Morris, because I wanted to have the same last name as my son... NOW, my ex (the idiot) wants to change his last name, add a "Mc" to it, McMorris. So that would leave my son and I with Morris while his dad is McMorris (or my ex will change my sons name to McMorris too). But that would leave me as a Morris by myself.
My options... Change my name to McMorris (to be like my son), change my son and I's names back to my maiden name, or try to talk my ex into Not changing his name at all... OR, leave our (me and son) name Morris and let my ex just change his....
What would you do?
As you can see, I've already been through one name change with my son, I don't think we should again

 
TessaHoney

Asked by TessaHoney at 12:10 PM on Sep. 6, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 9 (348 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (11)
  • I WOULD GO WITH YOUR MAIDEN NAME AND LEAVE IT AT THAT ....HE SOUNDS LIKE A JERK AND I WOULDN'T WANT TO SHARE ANY NAME WITH HIM :)
    ELIZABETHSMO902

    Answer by ELIZABETHSMO902 at 12:20 PM on Sep. 6, 2010

  • If it were me I could not change the names again. I would keep the names you have now. But you need to do what you feel is best for you and your son.
    confused969

    Answer by confused969 at 12:21 PM on Sep. 6, 2010

  • Its honesetly up to you... Its the last name hes going to live with for the rest of his life. & if his daddy changes his last name, then they're not going to share the same name anyway..

    if you feel you rather change the last name go for it...
    lilmoosesmom

    Answer by lilmoosesmom at 12:21 PM on Sep. 6, 2010

  • Well for me this depends on the age of the child. If the child is young enough to not know it is happening then I would change to your maiden name and let the ex go screw himself. Why is he changing his name any way? That is odd. If the child is older and would realize what is happening then I would leave yours and child's alone and let the ex do whatever.
    aeneva

    Answer by aeneva at 12:26 PM on Sep. 6, 2010

  • Because of national security issues it is difficult to change your name. You have to have a court order for the name change to do things like get a driver's license. So that would mean you would have to go through the formal name change process with the court and it would probably involve a lawyrer, filing fees, and court fees. There would be fees for you and fees for your son. In order for your son's name to be changed the father would have to agree. It isn't a just go to court and it's done┬áthing. You have to notify everyone you own money, put ads in the paper, and do other things. The easiest time to change your name is when you get divorced.


    They spelled my name wrong on my divorce and I never noticed. Years later the DMV saw the error and said that is now my legal name and it will cost hundreds of $ to change. /span>

    Gailll

    Answer by Gailll at 1:13 PM on Sep. 6, 2010

  • My son has had a lot of problems with his name. It used to be you could change your name by changing your ss card and never using your old name. My husband and I were legally separated at the time of my son's birth and the state added the father's last name on the birth certificate. I got his ss card with my maiden name and never used his father's name. He got jobs with no problems and his learner's permit. Then after 911 everything changed. They forced him to have his father's name on his driver's license. It hasn't caused problems with ss or the IRS but it causes problems when he has to have ID. Recently his car was stollen and recovered. He couldn't get it from the impound lot because his license said one name and the title, registratiion, and all his other things said another. He has never met his father but his father told me in court he will never let him change his name.

    Gailll

    Answer by Gailll at 1:24 PM on Sep. 6, 2010

  • I think I would leave it as it is.
    JawgaMom1

    Answer by JawgaMom1 at 4:00 PM on Sep. 6, 2010

  • Names have been changed to protect the innocent.
    TessaHoney

    Comment by TessaHoney (original poster) at 12:10 PM on Sep. 6, 2010

  • My son's three.
    TessaHoney

    Comment by TessaHoney (original poster) at 12:19 PM on Sep. 6, 2010

  • I've been through the legal, formal name change with my son once already (two years ago) in my state it isn't a bit hard. The fee's aren't very high, no lawyer is needed. My main concern is the once again changing his name, putting him through that... And my other concern is if I leave his name the same then what kind of "pride" (for lack of a better word) will he be able to take in being a Morris? I want him to feel like he is somebody when he's grown. I'm beginning to think I should just leave it alone and hope that I can marry again to someone who will adopt him and make him feel like he can be proud of where he came from. Most of all I don't want to make a mistake with him. The reason I changed his first name was because no one called him by that name, he didn't know himself by that name, it didn't fit him and not changing it would just make it harder on him when he went into school. Last name is different though, I know.
    TessaHoney

    Comment by TessaHoney (original poster) at 1:45 PM on Sep. 6, 2010

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