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2 Bumps

My 9 year old son acts out around my boyfriend what can I do?

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maggeymae1234

Asked by maggeymae1234 at 11:19 PM on Sep. 6, 2010 in Tweens (9-12)

Level 2 (9 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • Maybe some space is called for. Maybe dont invade your child's personal space with the boyfriend. give them a break from eachother.
    sati769leigh

    Answer by sati769leigh at 11:22 PM on Sep. 6, 2010

  • he probably needs more attention from you during these situations where your boyfriend is around. It's hard to say though without any other details of HOW he is acting out. Sounds like jealousy though.
    CrnchyMamaCraig

    Answer by CrnchyMamaCraig at 11:23 PM on Sep. 6, 2010

  • I would start by sitting son down and asking him whats going on? Does he like your bf, does he get along with him. Also does bf try to discipline him when son starts acting up? Kids sometimes have a tough time making the transition from daddy to moms new friend. He might be having a hard time accepting this new man into both your lives. Be patient and loving and try to see things from his point of view...good luck
    beyondhopes

    Answer by beyondhopes at 11:23 PM on Sep. 6, 2010

  • He wants attention from his mom? Your child feelings need to be respected. Have you sat down with him and asked him how he felt about things, and what you can do as his mom to make him feel better? He didn't ask for divorce, visiting his dad. He is probably frustrated and angry. I agree with sati769, give the boy some space and talk to him.
    zakityzak

    Answer by zakityzak at 11:25 PM on Sep. 6, 2010

  • How do they get along? Maybe he feels like you pay more attention to your BF than him. Set aside some alone time for the two of you, this could be all he needs.
    amessageofhope

    Answer by amessageofhope at 12:18 AM on Sep. 7, 2010

  • Let him know what behaviors are and are not acceptable. Let him know that whatever the reason for the negative behaviors, the behaviors will not be tolerated. Punish the negative behaviors as you otherwise would.

    Then talk to him about how he's feeling. Sometimes, kids just want to be heard. Let him know that he's entitled to his feelings, but that it is your choice - not his - who you bring into your life. His acting out will not change that.

    And make sure to have some one on one time with your son, too. Not to talk, just to hang out together and do things. Maybe make pizza together or watch a movie and pop some popcorn. Do this on a regular basis.
    justnancyb

    Answer by justnancyb at 10:38 AM on Sep. 8, 2010

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