I was adopted at the age of 3and as I grew up I always wanted to know who my parents were. I am now 26 and I have met my birth parents and I wish I never had. I think that putting me up for adoption on their half was a good thing but, when I first was hangin gout getting to my mother she was always comparing me and my daughters. I never wanted to say anything but I always thought to myself "You gave me up for adoption how would you know what I was like when I was little. You weren't there for me." What do you think? I cut off tyes wth her now casue she was just acting to childish and seemed to want an instant family now that she has met me and my husband and kids. Do you think it was right for me to do so? Would you do the same thing if they thought they knew you after all this time?Answer Question
Answer by colethky at 7:50 AM on Sep. 7, 2010
Answer by MilkingMomma at 11:08 AM on Sep. 7, 2010
Answer by MilkingMomma at 11:11 AM on Sep. 7, 2010
Answer by MilkingMomma at 12:04 PM on Sep. 7, 2010
When you were adopted you didn't get a vote. Your life was decided by your birth parents and your adoptive parents. As the adoptee you get to call the shots of the reunion. It's your time to have the control, so you have every right to cut ties with her if that's want you want.
But please be kind. You were the one who initiated contact (did I infer that right?) let her down gently. As a reunited birth mother my biggest fear in life is losing my son for a second time. At first it was paralyzing and only after 4 years I've become to trust that he's not going anywhere. It would destroy me if he told me he didn't want me in his life anymore.
As far as being childish, it's an extremely common and well documented phenomena for birth mothers to mentally revert to the age they were at relinquishment when the reunite with their adoptee children. Strange but true.
Answer by onethentwins at 12:46 PM on Sep. 7, 2010
Answer by ceejay1 at 10:33 AM on Sep. 8, 2010
Answer by hobbitswife04 at 11:12 PM on Sep. 10, 2010
Answer by mekarevell at 12:53 AM on Oct. 12, 2010