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Do your kids just not care about their stuff at all?

My 10yo just informed us that she doesn't know where her sweater is. She wore it to school last week and doesn't know what she did with it. She insists she brought it home but obviously didn't hang it where it belongs. I told her she better find it when she gets home and she just shrugged and said, "well, it didn't fit me anyway." She doesn't care at all. She knows she'll be grounded if she doesn't find it and she still just doesn't care.

 
justanotherjen

Asked by justanotherjen at 11:18 AM on Sep. 7, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 26 (28,174 Credits)
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Answers (21)
  • When I was about 10, I came home from school, dumped my backpack in the front yard (full of my homework and other school things), and ran off to play with my friends. I came home a few hours later, and the backpack was gone. Since my dad was home, I figured he had picked it up, and brought it in the house. So I came in, looked around, and didn't see it. I asked my dad where it was, and he said "In the trash." So, I freaked out about my homework and how I would get in trouble at school and blah blah blah. All my dad said was "You need to take better care of your things", then went and got the backpack out of his closet.

    I took better care of my things after that.

    Maybe you could try something similar with your daughter, but then again, I actually cared about my stuff, so it might not work with her.
    makelineerror

    Answer by makelineerror at 12:07 PM on Sep. 7, 2010

  • My 9 year old is like that. It's frustrating considering its not like they're losing free stuff.
    Ginger0104

    Answer by Ginger0104 at 11:19 AM on Sep. 7, 2010

  • Aww I know how you feel. They just need to develop their sense of responsibility!
    leah_rai

    Answer by leah_rai at 11:20 AM on Sep. 7, 2010

  • I don't think kids understand what it takes to care about things like that, like how much it costs to work for the money to pay for that sweater type of understanding.. I used to be like that too and looking back , it was crappy to be like that but I just didn't see the importance when my mom yelled about stuff like this.. I do now.. but not then.
    maxsmom11807

    Answer by maxsmom11807 at 11:21 AM on Sep. 7, 2010

  • My oldest used to do that. Backbacks and sweatshirts. He is better now. He is 12.
    Musicmom80

    Answer by Musicmom80 at 11:21 AM on Sep. 7, 2010

  • my girls 5 and 3 are like that it seems like they don't care about anything, clothes or anything, it makes me mad, we have resorted to inly buying them the necessities until there old enough to take care of their stuff, I cannot continue to spend money on things there only gonna destroy.
    babyangelromero

    Answer by babyangelromero at 11:24 AM on Sep. 7, 2010

  • My youngest is like that. My oldest will lose things but she actually cares that its missing and tries to put things away so she can find it the next time.
    dmelyoung

    Answer by dmelyoung at 11:25 AM on Sep. 7, 2010

  • my son goes through stages like that and when he does i quit buying him stuff and tell him i wont buy him anything else till i see improvement on him taking better care of things. I will also go through his things and throw away anything that looks trashy..i don't care if he likes it or not..i tell him if he doesnt want me to toss things then he needs to keep them where they belong so little peices dont become lost and broken
    shay1130

    Answer by shay1130 at 11:30 AM on Sep. 7, 2010

  • Ahh, the problem is we already only buy them necessities and very few gifts (like 1 or 2 things for birthday and Christmas). This was her only sweater that fit (well, it fit better then her other ones and could have been passed down to her 4yo sister). So she went to the bus stop in the rain with no sweater on.
    She doesn't even care that she'll have to sit through school sopping wet. Oh, and the stupid part is she has a jacket. It's part of her winter coat (it's the inside lining and it comes out to be a light jacket) but she REFUSES to wear it. She only wants to wear hoodies or zippered, hooded sweaters. She's 10 so I didn't even fight with her. She can be soaking wet for all I care. She ticked me off this morning wanting to know why I didn't make her lunch for her. The 3 of them were told to make their lunch after dinner (since all the sandwich stuff was out). She didn't do it.
    justanotherjen

    Comment by justanotherjen (original poster) at 11:30 AM on Sep. 7, 2010

  • If my kids ruin or lose their stuff, I just don't replace it unless it is a necesity, and if it is a necesity and I have to replace them, I make them pay me back in chores. Doing chores to make up for the value of things they break or lose can be a great way to teach them responsibility and the value of things.
    riotgrrl

    Answer by riotgrrl at 12:04 PM on Sep. 7, 2010

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