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4 Bumps

How can i find an adopted brother?

My mom gave up a son before i was born. I know some info on him and bout him. And would as a surpise find him for her. How would i go bout looking? Ive tried facebook and myspace and have no luck, cux i think they changed his name then the one my mom gave him.

Answer Question
 
SingleMommy21

Asked by SingleMommy21 at 1:35 PM on Sep. 7, 2010 in Adoption

Level 4 (45 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • Was the adoption through an agency? Can they help?
    lovinangels

    Answer by lovinangels at 1:36 PM on Sep. 7, 2010

  • If you know what hospital he was born at, you may be able to talk to them and see if they can give you the dates children were adopted.. then you could look at adoption agencies and see if they have records..
    SuperrMommyy

    Answer by SuperrMommyy at 1:37 PM on Sep. 7, 2010

  • Best place to start is go to adoption agency. But I am not sure if they would do that for you. Since you are not the parent or the adoptive child. And if they do it will cost you money. Also be aware if they do find him. He may or may not want to see her.
    I found my birth mother through reuion.com ( it was something like that. Can't quite remember that was over 8 yrs ago) It was free to put in info and if that person was there. The could look and get in contact with you.
    Raeann11

    Answer by Raeann11 at 1:39 PM on Sep. 7, 2010

  • I have tried the hospital they can not give you any info at all.
    Raeann11

    Answer by Raeann11 at 1:40 PM on Sep. 7, 2010

  • I'm in your boat. I have a sister that I want to find. She was born 2 yrs before me. My mom flat out refuses to find her for me.
    butterflyblue19

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 1:53 PM on Sep. 7, 2010

  • I'm all about reunion, but I think surprising your mother is a bad idea. Reunion needs to be prepared for. When I reunited with my son I was overcome with grief and spent the next nine months in a fetal position. Don't get me wrong, wild horses couldn't make me leave my son again, but this stuff is no joke. Pick up a copy of the book "Birthright: A guide to search and reunion for Adoptees, Birth Parents and Adoptive Parents" by Jean Strauss. Then tell your mom you want to find your brother (you have every right to want to know him btw) and ask her for all information she has; Adoption agency, lawyer, dates etc. Then check out the group Adoption Search Resources http://www.cafemom.com/group/35065 

    onethentwins

    Answer by onethentwins at 2:02 PM on Sep. 7, 2010

  • onethentwins

    Answer by onethentwins at 2:03 PM on Sep. 7, 2010

  • my mom has real bad bi polar so im not sure shed no the answers and she wants to find him she just scared that the adoptive parents never told him. and i no his birth name his birth mth and yr and his adoptive parents name and where they live just dont want to write them and get in trouble for that
    SingleMommy21

    Comment by SingleMommy21 (original poster) at 2:15 PM on Sep. 7, 2010

  • If the adoptive parents haven't told him the truth then shame on them. He has every right to know you and your mom if he wants to. So you know his last name and the address of his aparents. Google for a "search angel" in the state you think he is in. Search Angels are volunteers who are good at finding people separated by adoption.
    onethentwins

    Answer by onethentwins at 3:42 PM on Sep. 7, 2010

  • I would think starting with the adoption agency would be your best bet. However, make sure your mom knows that you are going to search for him before you "surprise" her. She could possibly experience all types of emotions that she may not even understand or handle in connection with the entire situation and you wouldn't want to place her in that situation. Do let your good intentions be ill spoken of.
    bean4700

    Answer by bean4700 at 11:54 PM on Sep. 9, 2010

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