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2 Bumps

Gender Disappointment?

Has anyone ever experienced it? How long did it last? Was your husband experiencing it also?
I am a mother of an almost 5 year old girl and am pregnant with another girl. My husband and I were only going to have two children and were really looking forward towards having one girl and one boy. When we found out it was another girl, which was only a few days ago, we both kinda felt a loss. We had picked out boy names and I had purchased (a few years ago) a boy outfit. I had this image in my head of a beautiful blond boy to match my beautiful blond girl. My husband had visions of bonding in a way he hasn't with our daughter. Now we have no girl names and we just feel like we lost something. Just wondering if anyone else has felt this, and how long it lasts? Is it normal? I have a Doctors appointment next Friday if you think I should talk to my Dr about it. Thanks.


Asked by cloverlover24 at 2:13 PM on Sep. 7, 2010 in Pregnancy

Level 12 (731 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • Don't let anyone make you feel bad for wishing for a boy. It's normal to have ideas in your head of what you want and envisioned for yourself and family. I wanted a girl with my first and he was a boy! It didn't take long for me to get excited about having a boy though,..Just think about all the cute little things your girls will be able to do together,..the bond they will have etc. Focus on all the GOOD things having another girl entails and you'll be excited soon enough.

    Answer by CrnchyMamaCraig at 4:13 PM on Sep. 7, 2010

  • I have two little girls.. then I got pregnant. I wanted a boy this time just because I already had experienced raising little girls. Well..ITS A GIRL!! We were a little disappointed at first, but it wore off quickly & now we cannot wait to meet our beautiful baby girl! =)♥

    Answer by SuperrMommyy at 2:15 PM on Sep. 7, 2010

  • i find out tonight what im having... i hope for a boy but hubby wants a girl.... but you know what we both want a happy bouncing healthy baby... that will make us the happiest

    Answer by pinkdena at 2:19 PM on Sep. 7, 2010

  • I was very surprised when we found out we were having a girl... I would have lost money if I had put a bet on whether we were having a boy or a girl... I was pretty stunned for about a few days but was soon very excited about having a girl and being able to do all the mother/daughter things with her

    Answer by elizabiza at 2:27 PM on Sep. 7, 2010

  • I wanted a boy with my first. got a girl. Wanted a boy with my second, had a girl. Had a miscariage between them. It was a boy. Wanted to try for a boy. But was so worried I would have another girl I stoped at 2 girls. If their would have been a 100% chance on #3 to be a boy I would have tried again.

    Answer by louise2 at 2:29 PM on Sep. 7, 2010

  • My first child was a girl, and I was really hoping my second child would be a girl too (we're only having two, and growing up I always wished I had a sister). So when the ultrasound said we were having a boy, I was surprised and a little disappointed. I thought baby boy clothes weren't cute, and we didn't like any baby boy names. While I was pregnant with my son, the first time I packed up clothes my daughter had outgrown I cried because I realized I would never have a baby that could wear those clothes again (I LOVED her little dresses and outfits). But I got more excited about having a boy as my pregnancy went on. We finally found a boy's name that we loved, we realized a lot of our friends had boys that would be near our son's age, and we got some cute baby boy clothes. My son is a year now, and I love him so much and am so happy he's him. While the baby's genger may be what you're hoping for, you will still love her so muc

    Answer by jilby at 2:36 PM on Sep. 7, 2010

  • i think if you picture a little girl, different from you first with her own personality they way youve put thought into a little boy you might feel better, and even though you may want to be done at 2 you never know you might not be and a boy might be your third, i ould just try focusing on the blessing you are having now and how different shell be from the first. i personally havent had gender disappointment but i know its real and youll feel better soon:)

    Answer by Kre10 at 2:40 PM on Sep. 7, 2010

  • I think disappointment is natural,but not for long. Any baby is a blessing and you will love her just as much. I understand your DH wanting a boy, but you get what you sense in being upset by it. What would you do if something went wrong? you would be devestated right? So appreciate what you are having...a sister for your dd. You can always try again, and there are ways of upping the odds in favor of a boy. Read, choosing the sex of your baby.

    Answer by salexander at 2:47 PM on Sep. 7, 2010

  • Thanks. I have never had a sister but my mother had 4 sister and they always seemed to not "hate" each other but lovingly dislike each other. I have one brother who I love so much and always have. So many of my friends would fight with their brothers or sisters and I can not really remember a time when the two of us ever disagreed. We still talk about things and he is the one person I can talk to that will not give me a generic response because he is family. I wanted that for my daughter and I wanted a boy for my husband to rough around with. I know that I can try for another but like I said we were going to stop at two and with three there is always a chance that one will be left out. I loved my relationship with my brother in that we were all each other had, and we enjoyed every moment of it. I know that I will overcome what I wanted and get on with having a baby who I will love, just kind of still stings a little.

    Comment by cloverlover24 (original poster) at 4:24 PM on Sep. 7, 2010

  • a little , We have a 7 yr old boy, and 3 girls, and this time it is girl number four! LOL

    Answer by JoLee12345 at 5:44 PM on Sep. 7, 2010