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Being a SAHM has given me social anxiety....

I used to be outgoing and easy to talk to.. and now I dread the thought of going out, and when I do, I can hardly talk to people without getting nervous or awkward! Has this happened to anyone else?

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Asked by Anonymous at 2:06 AM on Oct. 14, 2008 in General Parenting

Answers (11)
  • HI! I was a sahm for many years. I finally decided to go back to work, we needed the income. I understand how you feel. I was shy and then I just felt stupid. But what I have figured out after the last five years of working is that...
    Noone really has time to worry about you. Stop being self concious and just get out there and have fun with other moms. Life is so short, don't feel bad, just live your life!!!

    Answer by SusieD250 at 2:39 AM on Oct. 14, 2008

  • yes! i used to be like that and really i still am in a way, it's funny too because i am able to comunicate better with people over the phone or the net than in person which is good for my line of work but it would be nice to just meet people and feel comfortable :)

    Answer by MyO3WorldMomma at 2:40 AM on Oct. 14, 2008

  • I am a SAHM as well. I feel kinda bad because I will encourage my daughters to "make friends" when we go to the park and I'll nod "hi" and that's about it. My VERY outgoing daughter asked why i don't try to make friends. "Just talk to them...Say hi," she'll say when another mom comes by. Yes she is wise beyond her years. I just smile and say, "don't worry about mommy, I'm going to tend to baby." I was worried last winter because I'm also afraid of driving in snow that I was literally becoming agoraphobic. I inched my way out, forced myself to drive, and began making small talk with those I first felt comfortable with.It gets better with practice. Just take my daughter's advice, "Just talk to them...Say hi." You'll be fine.

    Answer by jenlaplant at 2:48 AM on Oct. 14, 2008

  • I know how you feel! I've became an anti-social house hermit.

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:36 AM on Oct. 14, 2008

  • LOL, I think I've become a tad anti social to the IRL world! Bwhahahahaha.. oh well.... My computer friends ROCK!

    eye rolling


    Answer by LizMomTo4Girls at 10:11 AM on Oct. 14, 2008

  • Me too. I'm a SAHM and I took baby steps. I would go out for drives - when the babies were first born - to the supermarket, and cry all the way there because I didn't want to be separated from them! Luckily, DH insisted I needed little breaks and he was right. Then I would take my DDs to Preschool and volunteer at every party, and got to know a couple of those party moms pretty well. Now my list of social friends has grown. Granted I probably will never have a circle of friends that I'll do tons with like some moms do, but even one or two semi-close buddies is better than nothing!

    Answer by tikigoddess at 10:45 AM on Oct. 14, 2008

  • I think in this society women are so pushed to be EVERYTHING, that when we aren't perfect we get very low. Think about it. What do you feel society expects from you?

    I always feel like I am supposed to work a full time job, make good money doing it. Come home cook, clean a perfect house and do laundry. Not to mention have perfect well adjusted kids. Have a great body and go to the gym. And keep your hubby satisfied in the sack.


    Answer by evilabbysmom at 11:19 AM on Oct. 14, 2008

  • Well, you know what, I can't do it. I stopped trying. I stay at home with my little one, because she needs me, and I really don't have a babysitter I trust. Financially we are straining, but my daughter is thriving. So for me it is a trade of sorts.

    If you are a SAHM because you want to be. Then say it loud and say it proud!!!


    Answer by evilabbysmom at 11:19 AM on Oct. 14, 2008

  • Same here, and it's hard for me too, because my husband is in the military so we're always moving every few years and I have to start all over. We've been at this new post now since May and I haven't even tried to go out and make friends. Even grocery shopping, if I haven't been out in a long time, can make me nervous. Or if I'm out somewhere with my kids, like at the park, and there are other mom's there I usually don't talk to them because I can never figure out what to say. Whereas when I was younger I could go up and talk to anyone about anything.

    Answer by lxy853 at 12:19 PM on Oct. 14, 2008

  • I think it is sister went through this and when her sons finally went to preschool she was terrified to socialize with the other moms. I told her if nothing else we all have child birth in common so there is always something to talk about.

    Answer by salexander at 12:41 PM on Oct. 14, 2008

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