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What is it exactly that makes a mother/mom?

In my mind, I think the woman who wipes the runny noses, potty trains, coddles the kid to sleep when they are not feeling good is the mother. The one who bathes the child and helps them get dressed. The one who is teching the child new things and taking them places to entertain them. the one who kisses their booboo's when they fall. My Step Sons bio mother is not involved. She sees him at her convienience once about every 4-8 months. He is so hurt and confused when she leaves again. I HATE seeing him like this. Some people think the mother is the one who pushed the kid out. I dont think so. I think the mother is the one who steps up to raise and love the child.


Asked by Anonymous at 2:41 PM on Oct. 14, 2008 in Just for Fun

This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • I agree with you and I also raise my SS. He lives with me and I help support him and I take care of him. My hubby works 2 jobs and goes to school. MY son's bio-mom has nothing to do with him unless he is physically with her. She never calls him and only has him every other weekend. When we first got together 6 years ago, she was no where to be found. She had nothing to do with him at all and would only come around every 8 months or so then she'd disappear again. Then one day she found out he was livign with me and I was raising him, all of a sudden she decided to be in his life again. In my opinion not enough, but he's better off without her.

    Answer by feesharose at 2:45 PM on Oct. 14, 2008

  • i think the same a mother is the one raised and show love to their kids

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:45 PM on Oct. 14, 2008

  • I think that biology makes you a mother but love for the child makes you a mom. Anybody can be a mother or a father, put it takes someone to really care to be a mom or a dad. My sister Amanda is my half sister, however, no one in my family labels her that way. She used to tell people she had a father (her bio father) and a daddy (my dad). My SS says that too. He has a mother and a mommy. He calls me mommy when his mother isn't around just because he is scared that it will start drama with his mother.

    Answer by Mom1Stepmom1 at 2:45 PM on Oct. 14, 2008

  • YAY YOU! My stepmom IS my mother. My mother left me, and never supported me emotionally. My stepmom was always there for me. I might not liked everything she said. But she was good to me and cared for me.
    The mother is the one that doesn't want to see the child hurting, or wanting for anything. My mom could have cared less about either of those things, but my stepmom; always there.
    You are his mom, and when he gets older he will see the difference.

    Answer by evilabbysmom at 2:46 PM on Oct. 14, 2008

  • Feesharose!! OMG, your husband's ex sounds just like mine! She disappeared for months at a time until she somehow heard that I was going to adopt my SS, then she decided that she could be involved. But unless he is with her, he doesn't exist. She doesn't do school functions or doctors visits or anything like that.

    Answer by Mom1Stepmom1 at 2:48 PM on Oct. 14, 2008

  • well u are the mother and u should not even asked that. she will know when he gets older i know what he is going throw my mother gave me to her grandparents when i was 2 and she told my dad he was 2 years to late she got me back when i was 12 because they were in bad health i never called her mom and found a way out as fast as i could she did not tell me who my dad was tell i was married and had kids of my own and the best part was that when she told me she allso told me that she had foud hem he die'ed in prison that is not a mother and if i were u i would tell her to leave and never turn back i know that sounds bad but i wish that is what my mom would have done she coused me more pain comeing back then when she left god bless u for being there for that lil boy he needs u

    Answer by vnessa65 at 2:54 PM on Oct. 14, 2008

  • I think he already senses she does not like him. I only asked because yesterday I posted a question about what to do with bio mom and some people said its none of my business and I didnt think that was fair given that I have been here for him all along. I wish she would give him up. I dont understand why she wont. She gave up her baby girl for adoption (from another relationship) because the man she was dating did not want kids. What makes it okay for her to cut in and out all of the time when she didnt want her other baby? I think she still loves my husband and I know she hates me (she referes to me as "that fucking person") I think the only reason she does come around is to see my husband, not their son. Its like she gets her one or 2 hour fix and that is enough to last a long while. If you saw the confusion in his face you would feel the same I think. You can actually see his little heart breaking. Its so sad.

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:03 PM on Oct. 14, 2008

  • I raised my 3 step-kids and their bio mom is the same way. Just try to be there for him when she does her thing. He'll be hurt and even though it hurts you just as much, he knows who is there for him. My step-kids all call me mom and consider me their mom. She is just a "donor" as my daughter calls her. The mom is the one that is there to love them and care for them.

    Answer by Sue41 at 3:43 PM on Oct. 14, 2008