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What's goingon?!

dh and I got into it last night over the stupidest thing..I'm a sahm, and dh feels like I should just pick up after him. He leaves bowls of milk from cereal on the nightstand by his side of the bed an anything he might snack on late at night. I don't feel like I should have to pick up after him and that it's not too much to ask for him to take it to the sink. But apparently he does, just like how he thinks it's too much to put a roll if toilet paper back on the to holder bc it's one more step he woul have to do. So last night wasn't good..he wouldn't talk to me and stayed mad the rest of the night. Then, tonight I went out to dinner with my dad, and dh was more than welcome to come..but he said he couldn't bc of work..understandable..but I assumed that since he knew we were going out that he would grab something on the way home..he comes home looks at the mail, looks around an says did u not figure something out for dinner

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mom_to_kenzie

Asked by mom_to_kenzie at 8:34 PM on Sep. 8, 2010 in Relationships

Level 18 (4,800 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • For me..I was like no I assumed u were going o grabsonething since u knew we were eating with my dad..so he gets mad fixes himself something to eat..doesn't say a word to me, goes to the bedroom and shuts the door..and sorry to keep rambling but lately he keeps bringing up whatwould happen if we split up..I'm confused asto why he keeps bringing thi up..and hurt at thesame time..he swear up anddown that he's not going anywhere but when he keeps asking, what else am I suppose to think?!
    mom_to_kenzie

    Comment by mom_to_kenzie (original poster) at 8:38 PM on Sep. 8, 2010

  • lol, i would have said you seem fond of cereal.... make yourself a bowl. but i know how you feel. it's not about who cleans up what or doing this or that. it's about respect and being taken for granted. your hubby is treating you like mine treated me. he took me for granted and didn't respect what i do as a mother and a wife. for me, it got to the point where i was trying to save up money to move out and told him i wanted to get a divorce. he has done a complete turn around and now he is much more respectful toward me and considerate. now i basically do the same things, but at least he appreciates it now. i think that you two need to have a serious discussion.... not fight but talk about how you feel. in the meantime ((hugs)) and gl!
    princessbeth79

    Answer by princessbeth79 at 8:38 PM on Sep. 8, 2010

  • I'm sorry but you have a full time job... it's called Parenting... you must do it 24/7. He lives in the house too, he can help take care of it!! Tell him if he wants a maid to hire one!!

    Morgain

    Answer by Morgain at 8:39 PM on Sep. 8, 2010

  • He acking a hot mess. When you're a sahm they think you have all the freetime in the world to just clean and cater to them when they get home. You just have to start walking around when he gets in and tell him all the things you did that day and he will shut up then. Let him know you got a job too.
    mekarevell

    Answer by mekarevell at 8:41 PM on Sep. 8, 2010

  • I refuse to clean up after my husband unless he is sick or something like that..and I tell him hey your the adult not the child pick up your stuff...I make my kids put their plates and stuff in the sink as well.
    sweet_mamaof3

    Answer by sweet_mamaof3 at 8:41 PM on Sep. 8, 2010

  • Your husband is lazy.
    He is a grown man and is very capable to pick up after himself and fix his own food. You are not his mother, you are not his maid, you do not have to wait on him hand and food. He needs to grow up and take responsibility for himself.
    JazzlikeMraz

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 9:31 PM on Sep. 8, 2010

  • oh waow, guys think its ok to act like this wen ur a sahm cos they think they have a right to jave things picked up after them cos they go out and work all day and bring home the bacon. he doesn realise how hard u work to keep the house and children in order. i would go of for a weekend to my sis or whoevr and leave him to look after the house and kids. if he doesn't get it then, i would have a serious talk with him as claimly as i can, cos men only egnore you when u get mad at them, they are worse than kids.
    otoole

    Answer by otoole at 9:36 PM on Sep. 8, 2010

  • You're dealing with the same thing I am. I am more than willing and happy to do ALL the housework,laundry, cooking etc. All I ask is that he puts his dirty clothes in the hamper, dirty dishes at least in the kitchen, and empty pepsi cans in the bin. Does it happen? Maybe 10% of the time. It drives me N U T S. I feel like he is not respecting the house I work so hard to keep clean and I feel he's taking me for granted.
    For awhile I let his stuff just pile up...well, for like 2 days then I couldn't handle it anymore. Now I just find myself picking up after him and sending him little reminder text messages about what he forgot to clean up. I really think it's not worth arguing over anymore.
    Orionsgirl

    Answer by Orionsgirl at 11:25 PM on Sep. 8, 2010

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