Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

2 Bumps

Husband caught sending pics to an ex gf. What to do?

SO. My husband returned yesterday from training for deployment for 3 weeks yesterday.. I went through his phone, because a little voice told me too. Found in his "Sents" there was a picture of his penis sent to a girl named Brandy. So i asked him about it. He grabbed his phone quickly and apologized and said it was because he's been out in the desert for 3 weeks. I went ape shit on him, and he was speechless. Never in a million years would i have thought he was THIS type of guy. And just today i found out through my best friend that he had sent her a text or two while we were engaged and pregnant, asking her if she would have sex with him if he wasn't with me. He is very disappointed in himself. I am almost 4 months pregnant. And i am THIIIIIS close to leaving him, and moving out of his nieces and back into my parents. I'm not sure what the right thing to do is. So here I am seeking advice. Thank you for reading.

Answer Question

Asked by Mskixxalot at 11:32 AM on Sep. 9, 2010 in Relationships

Level 8 (219 Credits)
Answers (19)
  • I would leave.. I think he's messed up more than once here & it sounds like he's making excuses for why he is doing it. I wouldn't put up with that.

    Answer by SuperrMommyy at 11:33 AM on Sep. 9, 2010

  • Um, sad situation. What's is wrong with him? Him blaming the desert is no excuse. I would have to leave him.

    Answer by Iluvmy5 at 11:35 AM on Sep. 9, 2010

  • Wow - I think it would be hard to EVER trust him again which would make it way hard to maintain an ongoing relationship.. I don't know. .that's tough - I am so sorry !

    Answer by maxsmom11807 at 11:36 AM on Sep. 9, 2010

  • Ummm, I am assuming that you asked him how he would feel if YOU were doing this, you know, since he was in the desert for 3 weeks and not with you.

    That is the lamest excuse that I have heard! Sorry hon, but I fear that this is not the only time he has done's only the first time he's gotten caught.

    I highly recommend counsiling.

    Answer by Jademom07 at 11:37 AM on Sep. 9, 2010

  • Sounds like he's got a problem and it's not going to stop. Even if you did stick around you'd go through a cycle of him kissing your ass and being family man for 6 mos to a year and then do it again until it leads to divorce. I'd be done.

    Answer by Musicmom80 at 11:38 AM on Sep. 9, 2010

  • Wak away, if you don't then your allowing him to treat you like that.. if he is coming on to people then he has probably already acted upon it.

    Answer by BobbieJo286 at 11:38 AM on Sep. 9, 2010

  • I'd bet there is a lot more going on than you know about. Sending pictures of his penis because he was in the desert for 3 weeks? Why didn't he send YOU those pics then? Leave him. He doesn't respect you and doesn't value your relationship.

    Answer by Scuba at 11:39 AM on Sep. 9, 2010

  • Wow! What a jackass! And the fact that he is making excuses shows that he doesn't think there is anything wrong with it and that he's not really sorry about it and that he would do it again. So sorry you are in this situation. *Hugs*

    Answer by Kword at 11:40 AM on Sep. 9, 2010

  • 3 weeks is not very long to be gone. Why was he not sending those pics to you? I'm sorry you are going through this.

    Answer by BluDog at 11:49 AM on Sep. 9, 2010

  • I would tell him he has 2 choices hand over the cell phone and get one without a camera and you stay but he has to continue to prove himself to you that he is truely sorry or

    he keeps his phone and the relationship is off

    Answer by wheresthewayout at 12:29 PM on Sep. 9, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.