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Halloween party

My 10 yr old dd was invited to Halloween party. She is grounded for mucho backtalk. The party is on Friday night. It's also an overnight and we haven't met the parents. Just got the invitation Tues. Should we let her go?

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Asked by Anonymous at 6:20 AM on Oct. 15, 2008 in Tweens (9-12)

Answers (4)
  • If she is grounded then I would not let her go. I feel that if my kids are grounded then there is a very good reason why and they need to learn a lesson.

    I have a friend who lets her kids earn time back. So if they are grounded for 3 days and they are good for the first 2 she might let them off early.

    I think it all depends on what you are comfortable with. If you really are not comfortable with her going then her being grounded is a great way to get out of her going.

    As far as the party itself. If she was not grounded I would let her go. I would call the parents and talk to them. If you think that everything will be okay then I would let her. She is old enough to call you if she does not want to stay or if she does not like something.

    Good Luck

    Answer by cornflakegirl3 at 11:14 AM on Oct. 15, 2008

  • My kids are grounded constantly and we have leaned more toward the idea of earning time back. If they atleast pretend they feel remorce or have learned a lesson then I give in a little early. I would definatly meet the parents or atleast talk to them on the phone. How much does your child really want to go? What would she do to earn this reward?

    Answer by taralynga at 12:03 PM on Oct. 15, 2008

  • I wouldn't let her go. She's more likely to learn her lesson if she realizes her misbehavior causes her to miss out on things. If you say, "oh, well, there's a party, I guess you can go", then what does that teach her? That her punishment doesn't exclude her from the "fun extras". What good is that?

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:15 PM on Oct. 15, 2008

  • It depends on what she was grounded for. Sometimes I am a little too harsh for minor offense and a slack sometimes on major ones. I make mistakes as a parent. Kids make mistakes too. I think parenting is a learning experience. If she really wants to go then she has to be punished for her mis-deeds in another way. Extra chores, loss of allowance. No tv , no computer until then etc. While it is important to be consistent in your parenting, I think communicating with your child and meeting them half way sometimes is equally important.


    Answer by CelticFaerie at 8:05 PM on Oct. 15, 2008

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