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3 Bumps

My daughter can be so hateful to her Daddy

Sometimes when he gets home from work she can be so mean to him. She will tell him to stay away from her, go back to work or just plain leave her alone. Sometimes she can be even more hateful. It is something she sees me do, I would never talk to him this way. It is not because he works, I work too. I don't know how to get her to stop, any ideas?

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Asked by Peajewel at 5:41 PM on Sep. 9, 2010 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Level 20 (8,881 Credits)
Answers (14)
  • Have you sat her down and talked to her why she acts this way towards him? We can't tell you why she does this since we aren't in your daughters head. You need to ask her. She may be 3 or 4 but they are smarter then most people think.

    Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 5:43 PM on Sep. 9, 2010

  • Uh.... MAKE HER STOP. Don't tolerate it. Disaplin her for being mean. You wouldn't let her talk to a friend that way, why is it ok to let her talk to her father that way? My son started doing the same thing and I nipped that crap in the bud right away. Its NOT ok.

    Answer by karamille at 5:45 PM on Sep. 9, 2010

  • I would start asking questions, there has to be a reason in her eyes, weither or not you will agree with the reason in a different story. Does he get on to her alot, or make her do things (like cleaning) that she doesn't want to do? Does she think he takes away time for you? is this something new or has it been going on for a while...

    Even though shes only 3 or 4, shes wayy smarter then you think. Children are a better judge of people then we adults are. =) Talk to her, tell her that she can't talk that way, but you need to find out why she is.

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:47 PM on Sep. 9, 2010

  • Eh, I dont know why It commented as anonymous. Im not ashamed of my answer. =)

    Answer by lilmoosesmom at 5:48 PM on Sep. 9, 2010

  • Tell her it is unacceptable to speak to him that way or to treat him like that.

    Answer by QandA at 5:54 PM on Sep. 9, 2010

  • yea i agree with the others if she is being mean just to him there has to be a reason why. i would sit and talk to her and try to get her to tell u why she acts like that to him. whatever it is it may be impertant to her and she may need to talk about it with you.

    Answer by NicNat8505 at 6:16 PM on Sep. 9, 2010

  • I agree with the others, ask her WHY she is acting like that

    Answer by Ashlynnsmommy07 at 7:43 PM on Sep. 9, 2010

  • Make sure that you are exhibiting that your DH is a man who should be respected. Even if you aren't directl doing the things that SHE is, small children can pick up on tiny things and act out on them on their own (ever see the Everybody Loves Raymond show where the mom makes fun of him by placing 'bets'? Same concept). So if that is at ALL possible (not saying it is- I don't know you at all), it might be important to talk up how fantastic Dh is with words and actions.

    Don't allow the behaviour. You can either A) ignore it if she is doing it for attention or B) figure out an appropraite reaction for her behaviour.

    Answer by ethans_momma06 at 8:24 PM on Sep. 9, 2010

  • Peajewel, I have a question. Does her daddy ever take her out to do a father daughter day? When she's wanted his attention, has he told her "Not Now"; when he comes home, does he pick her up and tell her he missed her? Does he spend time with her at all, I mean, like get down on the floor and color in one of her books with her? Does he put her to bed or read a book with her? When he's at work does he call and ask to talk to her and tell her he misses her? When's the last time he brought her home a gift. Nothing big, even just a pretty brush for her hair or a necklace from the dollar store? These are all things that might help restore their relationship. Or he's done something to her that has scared her and hurt her. You need to take her some place like the beach or park where you can spread out a blanket, have a picnic, and asks simple questions to get the truth. I pray this helps with the choices.

    Answer by Prayerpartner at 5:11 AM on Sep. 10, 2010

  • First, you need to found from her what the heck is going on. Maybe he did or said something to her, that she is having a difficult time dealing with. Second, let her know that this behavior is not allowed! Third, make sure that you are not acting toward your husband in the same way. (I am not saying you are, but something as subtle as a look can be picked up from a child.) She is at that age where she is testing her boundries too. Best of luck to you!

    Answer by Ks_mom94 at 5:19 AM on Sep. 10, 2010

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