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Agree or disagree?

I read this on a group post today and am interested in hearing the opinions of others.

(Paraphrased) "I don't teach my kids to say "Sir" and "Ma'am" because it's old-fashioned and outdated. It must just be a Southern thing, because talk like that doesn't fit in in most social settings."

Personally, I think that this opinion is ridiculous. Since when are manners outdated?


Asked by DusterMommy at 7:59 PM on Sep. 9, 2010 in Politics & Current Events

Level 26 (27,467 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (28)
  • Completely disagree. Manners are not considered outdated by those who actually have them!! :o)

    Answer by LoriKeet at 9:49 PM on Sep. 9, 2010

  • i agree with you, OP. manners do not become outdated, nor are they regional.
    and frankly, my dear, if my Southern roots show because i refer to someone as 'Sir' or 'Ma'am'', i don't give a damn!

    Answer by dullscissors at 9:21 PM on Sep. 9, 2010

  • Just because you say "sir" or "ma'am" does not mean you are being respectful...manners are pretty subjective and I laugh when someone calls me ma'am. I'm enlisted in the military, and some take it offensively if they are not an officer and addressed this way (I'm not one of those, but have been told by plenty "I work for a livin'!"). Also, for those of us from the West, it kinda means someone thinks you're old. Please and Thank you are more mainstream because they actually indicate graciousness and gratitude, a more tangible way to show respect...

    Answer by stringtheory at 8:13 PM on Sep. 9, 2010

  • dullscissors...woot woot!! You should get best answer!! As a native Texan I was raised on ma'am and sir. My hsuband a native of South Dakota was as well. We are now in Oregon and I hear it all the time and it isn't just military people. I am also called Mrs.----- by my boys friends. It wasn't at my request, it is just how it is done. I'm glad I don't live where they don't care enough to use proper manners.

    Answer by yourspecialkid at 9:34 PM on Sep. 9, 2010

  • I agree with the other poster from CA- these are not pleasantries that most are taught in this state. Although, as an adult, I do use these terms when I'm working with a pt's families and when I conduct business within the community. My grown (college-aged) children, while very polite and proper, would not use those specific terms. We taught Mr and Mrs, the same as our own folks instructed.

    Further, I sometimes laugh at folks who enforce certain "language" when behaviors do not match or reflect those words. My young nephews (3 boys in 3 years) can be very rambunctious, but their mom always insists on the most proper of manners, in terms of words-Hey, how about they not bounce the basketball in my marble foyer or jump on the couch, or do handsprings in the familyroom-


    Answer by Sisteract at 9:15 PM on Sep. 9, 2010

  • I much prefer being called ma'am than "Hey, you, lady!" I also teach my children to use sir and ma'am when they are talking to adults. I don't make them say it to ME, and other relatives that they see frequently, but definitely to people they don't know. It is just respect.

    Answer by 29again at 10:10 PM on Sep. 9, 2010

  • I was raised in NJ, MASS, NH & MAINE before moving to NC, & Im "yankee" through & through & I was raised with the Yes Sirs & No Ma'ams. & My son has learned them.. I can't stand that parents are just letting go of manners, even though it doesnt take much to teach a child, please & thank you.......


    Answer by lilmoosesmom at 8:01 PM on Sep. 9, 2010

  • I grew up in California, and the ONLY places Ive noticed people say that is in the south...Ive never heard ANYONE say that where I grew up. And I only hear it now around the army bases we live get stationed at, as the soldiers are required to use those words. personally, i dont teach my children to say it, but they DO have manners.

    Answer by anikahaynes1 at 8:05 PM on Sep. 9, 2010

  • I completely agree!

    Answer by agentwanda at 8:13 PM on Sep. 9, 2010

  • It feels realy nice when someone treat you with so much respect I said pass it on! i love to say mam! or sir! and I am teaching my boys to do it.

    Answer by violetlady at 9:47 PM on Sep. 9, 2010