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could some one tell me why it so heard to be a steppaernet

i have a stepkid who mopm tell her that she dos not have to lison to me but when she dos it only when her dad is with us what can i do to make it better for both of us????????
please help me

Answer Question
 
brighteyes184

Asked by brighteyes184 at 11:56 PM on Sep. 9, 2010 in Tweens (9-12)

Level 2 (12 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • a what?
    Blueliner

    Answer by Blueliner at 11:59 PM on Sep. 9, 2010

  • talk to the child and tell them that you care about them and you understand that your not their mom nor will you ever try to take the place of the mom.... just say that you are still an adult and need to be respected like one.
    pinkdena

    Answer by pinkdena at 12:00 AM on Sep. 10, 2010

  • Never say anything bad about the mom but always be nice to the step child and let them be the judge. just be the civil one and all will turn out just fine GL
    Butterfly1108

    Answer by Butterfly1108 at 12:05 AM on Sep. 10, 2010

  • Despite the fact that her mother tells her only to listen to her dad at home doesn't mean that it's right. When she is at her mother's she is expected to listen to her. But, when she is with you and her dad, she is expected to listen to both of you. I realize that she doesn't want to be replaced as her mother, but it's only right that she listens to you too. You and her dad should sit down and decide on some rules that are expected to be followed whether he is there or not. Also, she needs to be aware that she is also expected to listen to you while she is there. I hope things work out well for you.
    amessageofhope

    Answer by amessageofhope at 12:12 AM on Sep. 10, 2010

  • Explain to her, that her mother has a household and you and her dad have a household and her mom has rules in her home and you and her dad have rules in your home. Her mom expects for her to obey the rules in her home and you and her dad expect for her to obey the rules in your home. your not tryin to be her mom,you're just tryin to make sure every one is respected in each household.
    mrs2323

    Answer by mrs2323 at 12:22 AM on Sep. 10, 2010

  • thank you one all

    but she know that she just stated here you know what at age 11 help im only 28years old but i feel so old now .but your right i do keep telling her that but it like we have a good weekend and then the nexts one it bad it only when her dad is not there that i comes out of hinding. i love her but i just dont know what to do any more i have been with her dad since she was one years old and now it the perteens
    brighteyes184

    Comment by brighteyes184 (original poster) at 12:34 AM on Sep. 10, 2010

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