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2 Bumps

Divorce

im finally leaving my husband after 6yrs with our son, his drinking is getting worse hes gotten in trouble with the law and has gotten a DUI i cant take it anymore he's starting to get meaner and meaner when he drinks so i left.
i live in ohio and i was just wondering how i go threw with a divorce i have no money i went and got help from the government as much as i hated to and im putting in job applications everyday, but what do i do im so afraid that he will get visitations and im scared he will leave my son alone or my baby will get hurt how do i do this without hurting my son i know its going to hurt him but i want to do it has easy as i can, my husband is the one thats going to be doing all the hurting what do i do and how do i do it

by the way our son is 2

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 6:33 AM on Sep. 10, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (5)
  • I am sorry you are in this rough spot. First, you can get some help dealing with the alcohol issues at an al-anon meeting. They are a good resource since you share a child and will have to deal with your husband whether you are together or not. For my divorce, I was able to hire a paralegal since we agreed on the terms. I did not have children at the time. There are some good books about parenting plans and getting a divorce. "Between Love and Hate A Guide to Civilized Divorce" by Lois Gold is a good starting point. Good luck.
    tortkey

    Answer by tortkey at 7:22 AM on Sep. 10, 2010

  • Google "ohio bar association" and search the website for pro bono (free) legal advice. Sometimes it is easy to find and sometimes you have to search a little bit more. I think there is a public resources section at Ohio's site. GL
    elizabr

    Answer by elizabr at 7:50 AM on Sep. 10, 2010

  • Having problems with my husband, he has cheated in the past, how do i get past this so we can move forward in our relationship. I feel that if i do get help with my anger problem toward him about that situaion we will have problems in the future, also there may or may not be a child from the incedient that accurred almost 4 yrs. ago. I ask him to get a dna test but the so mom keeps giving us the run around about the whole situation. I 'm afraid that by me trying to push the issue of the dna is breaking up our relationship because i won't no part of the child untl i find out if it is his or not
    marie1067

    Answer by marie1067 at 10:11 AM on Sep. 10, 2010

  • Use a safety oriented parenting plan. No overnights and possibly supervised. In Oregon family, friends, or state can supervise. Bring up the drinking and ask for no consumption during visit and/or UA prior. My ex takes UA prior for other drugs.GL Momma!
    Caoimhe_Oona

    Answer by Caoimhe_Oona at 11:44 AM on Sep. 10, 2010

  • anon is a great idea. As is use your resources such as local womans shelter, legal aid etc.
    def. start up your documentation... get copies of DUI, arrests, incidents etc.
    be prepared to ask for.... supervised visitation, parenting and counseling courses, maybe even rehab/alchol abuse counseling if you are able to prove he needs it.
    a GAL is sometimes very helpful (some states appoint one automatically some don't)

    Do your research and hw and be prepared.
    Look into custody... do both have custody now? what does it take to file for emerg. custody etc.? since you are on aid there may be actual legal help with custody issues available to you... find out.
    MamiJaAyla

    Answer by MamiJaAyla at 6:18 PM on Sep. 12, 2010

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