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I have lost complete control of my home. My children run my home and the sad part is none of my 4 kids are over the age of 10. I discipline them! Time outs, taking toys away, taking priviledges away, spanking. Nothing is changing!!!! What do I do now?

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:35 AM on Sep. 10, 2010 in Parenting Debate

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Answers (10)
  • Perseverance is the most important thing I find. Also don't change your parenting strategies - you name three different ones, personally I don't find spanking effective but whatever you decide on doing stick with one parenting strategy and go with it for example time outs and priveleges being taken away - don't try lots of different things. Consistency is key.

    In my home we use sticker charts and it's heartbreaking for them if they don't get a treat at the end of the week and the rest do so they tend to behave well for that.

    Lastly if none of it is working I'd try upping the ante - for example don't just take toys away do worse: lower their bedtimes and make sure they stay in it, separate them from their friends, don't let them watch TV/Play Computer games.

    Good Luck! Remember show no fear!
    leah_rai

    Answer by leah_rai at 11:39 AM on Sep. 10, 2010

  • Put them on lock down till they straighten their act out and make them work for "privileges". That's all I've got. Good luck.
    MythicMMM

    Answer by MythicMMM at 11:39 AM on Sep. 10, 2010

  • I understand you - I think you're trying too many things, simplify it completely, sit them down once you've come up with set punishments and set rewards and write them all down on the bottom of the sticker charts etc...

    I always try explaining to the best of my ability to them why it hurts me that they do this - how it's hard for mummy and daddy.

    Good Luck! It will get better I promise!
    leah_rai

    Answer by leah_rai at 11:45 AM on Sep. 10, 2010

  • Nanny 911
    gulfcoastmom4

    Answer by gulfcoastmom4 at 4:05 PM on Sep. 10, 2010

  • I am trying the sticker chart toooo IT'S NOT WORKING EITHER. I don't understand why nothing works with my kids
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 11:41 AM on Sep. 10, 2010

  • I know my kids hated it when i would give them chores to do and it was an everyday thing till i said they learned their lesson. I also have put one in a chair in the middle of a room, looking at a blank wall, Ooooo they hated that as well. No allowance.. no TV no cell, no computer.. no friends. When i was littel my parents used that chart thing on me.. yep that straightened me out.. I had privaleges if i was good and nothing if i had to many red stars... Oh kids think that you are putting the fear of god them if you use that. Good luck in this.. You are not alone..
    Airforce3mom

    Answer by Airforce3mom at 11:45 AM on Sep. 10, 2010

  • yes i think the mommies are right make sure you just stick with one personally i wouldnt go for spanking but that depends if it works for you everyone is diferent my kids are still small but my2 year old was ina point where he wouldnt listen to me and he would try hitting everybody and he would trow fits where he would trow himself in the floor adn start hitting his head. well we ruled out ay medical issues with is doctor so i decided to go for the time out stradegy so now what i do is if he does something his not supose to he goes on time out if he does it again he goes on time out and looses tv privilages for the rest of the day and then if he does it again all his toys are gone well i only had to go through the process one time before he actually sraighten down and came to the conclusion i was serious ofcourse i felt more horrible than him when i would see him spend the afternoon withough toys or tv but it worked good luck
    Alejandra10

    Answer by Alejandra10 at 11:52 AM on Sep. 10, 2010

  • I know what you are going through I have 3 under the age of 10 and it is crazy in my house. I can't even take my kids to the store when I go if that tells you anything. What I have found out is just keep doing the same thing and it they will start to understand that you are serious. I know it may not seem like it but it will..Good luck.
    sweet_mamaof3

    Answer by sweet_mamaof3 at 11:58 AM on Sep. 10, 2010

  • I don't know for sure because I'm far from being an expert on child behavior. I personally would pick a day and remove every single privellage from the house for all of them, put them on lock down and start from scratch. If they start out with nothing and have to earn everything back it might work better than starting out with everything and loosing it as a punishment. It might encourage good behavior rather than you punishing the bad behavior as a reaction. I'm to not claiming to know everyhting and I could well be wrong, but it's worth a try if you've already done everything else.
    potterpeaches

    Answer by potterpeaches at 10:26 PM on Sep. 10, 2010

  • If you are consistent w/ the rules & discipline and its not working- time to call Super Nanny! Good luck!
    mrsmom110

    Answer by mrsmom110 at 8:55 AM on Sep. 11, 2010

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