Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

1 Bump

why can't I? adult content

I have been an exotic dancer before and i'd like to go back. but my DF says i can't(we meet while i was dancing) I miss the excitement of it, the workout the creativity of it, and i get paid for something i enjoy. Am i in the wrong for wanting to go back?


Asked by Anonymous at 3:45 PM on Sep. 10, 2010 in Money & Work

This question is closed.
Answers (12)
  • Really ladies, come down off your high horses. If you don't like the idea of a woman being an exotic dancer then don't post on a woman's question who says its what she wants to do. I hope you all feel so much better by offering your "more socially acceptable" recreations like education and for trying to belittle her with "what her resume looks like". Would you tell a single woman who wants to have a baby that she should get a puppy or take up yoga instead just because you thought a single woman shouldn't seek to be a single mother? Its really just insulting and that is not the goal of this site. Its to be supportive of one another as women.


    Answer by GoldenLinds at 2:16 AM on Sep. 11, 2010

  • Why don't you ask your DF WHY you can't go back. It may be that he just doesn't want other men looking at you in lust.

    Answer by Misteh at 3:47 PM on Sep. 10, 2010

  • You too need to sit and talk. He does not own you, on the other hand you owe his feelings some courtesy and respect too. sounds like the two of you need to talk about this at length

    Answer by BlacksheepSati at 3:47 PM on Sep. 10, 2010

  • I've always wanted to go back but I personally don't feel confident enough in my current shape. My husband is fully supportive though. I think the bigger question here is whether your husbands answer is driven by insecurity in your marriage that you may not be aware of, insecurity in himself, or possibly even shame he might feel about it. Even though rationally if you were dancing when you met he still might not accept it of his wife. I would talk to him and try to get to the root of the problem and if you can accpet his answer I'd let it go. You can always just make a date night with the girls and go get your groove on clubbing to release some of the desire to return to the stage.

    Answer by GoldenLinds at 3:49 PM on Sep. 10, 2010

  • Well is it hard to understand why he wouldnt want you taking your clothes off in front of other men? why not take advantage of educational opportunities and per sue a career that you can BOTH be proud of.

    Answer by SaturnsMom at 3:49 PM on Sep. 10, 2010

  • Maybe he is jealous of how those other men will be looking at you and he doesn't want to chance you getting hurt by some phsyco. He may also be worried about someone following you home and causing harm to your child/family?

    I'm sure he has his reasons. Why don't you ask him and have him tell you his reasonings?

    Answer by Memigen at 3:51 PM on Sep. 10, 2010

  • I hear ya girl..... I was a bartender at an exotic club where I met my husband.. hes totally cool with the idea of me going back to bartending but not at a strip club.. I was a little bitter about it untill I really sat down and thought if it were the other way around...

    Hes a wonderful husband and him and my two little girls are totally worth that small sacrifice...

    Answer by FITmama2B at 3:52 PM on Sep. 10, 2010

  • SaturnsMOm-

    I am a college educated woman with a BDegree and bartending at a gentlemens club half naked was BY FAR the funnest job EVER.... and I made more money ;-)

    Don't assume shes an uneducated woman.


    Answer by FITmama2B at 3:58 PM on Sep. 10, 2010

  • I was a bartender at a strip club, so i'm very familiar with the environment. Maybe it's not the dancing, but the lap dances. i've seen some crazy things and that's where it all starts. Explain to him why you want to go back, and reassure him you have eyes only for him.

    Answer by jolee0222 at 3:54 PM on Sep. 10, 2010

  • FITmama2B, she didn't say she was uneducated. She said "why not take advantage of educational opportunities".... =)

    Answer by firenicecream at 6:49 PM on Sep. 10, 2010