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How do you tell your nieghbor that you don't want your child over thier because he smokes inside the house?

My nieghbor is a single dad with a 5 year old. He is older to in his late 50 or 60 (but he smokes so that could add some age to his looks) and I know it has to be hard. I have told the girl she can come over whenever and play, but the whole time she is at the house she is asking me when my daughter can come over and play. I told her not to worry about it and go have fun, its not like my child has no toys??? She constantly asks me what things are, that she should know, like a necklace... she picks it up and says "what is this?" Anyway besides that she is slightly annoying her father tells me I can have my daughter over anytime. I walked his daughter home the other day and walked inside (I am pregnant) and I almost couldn't breathe. I don't want my child to be around that, we do not smoke and I don't know how to tell him I would rather not have my child inside his house???


Asked by cloverlover24 at 10:39 AM on Sep. 14, 2010 in Kids' Health

Level 12 (731 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (11)
  • You could let your DD go over, but make sure she stays outside to play. If your DD is asked to go inside to play, then you are just going to have tell the father you don't want her inside his home & why. You could say that, while you appreciate his willingness to host your DD, you would prefer that she not be exposed to the cigarette smoke inside his home because it makes her sick. I doubt he'd argue with you or take offense, so you save face and, technically, avoid lying because your DD probably would end up sick from being in so much smoke.

    Answer by mom2aspclboy at 3:20 PM on Sep. 14, 2010

  • I would just tell the truth..

    Answer by MTM at 10:42 AM on Sep. 14, 2010

  • just tell your neighbor the truth. you won't allow kid around people who smokes

    Answer by canta1980 at 10:42 AM on Sep. 14, 2010

  • well don't say anything if it's not a big issue, if he offered once and let it go then just keep them over there
    If you don't want to offend, just say u have to clean, men "understand" that lol
    and if you feel pressure, just tell them you don't want you or your children around 2nd and 3rd hand smoke
    it kills
    I don't see my sister much anymore because I don't want myself or my daughter around the smoke

    Answer by gottalovemal at 10:46 AM on Sep. 14, 2010

  • I would just tell him straight up but in a pleasant manner of course. If the father invites your dd over, mention she'd like to, but you'd appreciate if he smoked outside or just wait till dd comes home. I wouldnt think that's telling him how to run his household, it is afterall a health issue! It's all about how you word it to make it not offensive! If I was in his shoes, and my daughters friend and her mom wanted to be friends with us, I wouldnt be offended at all if all they asked was to not smoke in the house!

    Answer by Owl_Feather at 10:46 AM on Sep. 14, 2010

  • Just exactly what you just said. Be honest. Stick up for what you believe in.

    Answer by m-avi at 11:00 AM on Sep. 14, 2010

  • Just say it. Say you appreciate the offer and you want the girls to be friends and you love having her over, but you don't want your daughter around the smoke. Its not like he doesn't know its not healthy.

    Answer by daughteroftruth at 12:19 PM on Sep. 14, 2010

  • just say it straight out. it may spoil a good neighbor-hood-ship between you two but thats nowhere as important as your child's health

    Answer by americanadian25 at 2:31 PM on Sep. 14, 2010

  • Just tell the truth!

    Answer by sstepph at 3:23 PM on Sep. 14, 2010

  • I'd either just tell him how you feel or keep making excuses about why she can't go over. I wouldn't want my son there, either.

    Answer by PhilsBabyMama at 8:07 PM on Sep. 14, 2010