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3 Bumps

Is anyone else tired of women being blamed for being raped?

Our local news has been talking about College rape rates (which are actually down this year from last by almost 40%). One of the "Rape Advocates" (if you can call her that) said it's up to the women to make sure they aren't raped by making sure their house is secure, that doors & windows all have locks that work, by not drinking or using any drugs, and by not setting down their drink when the do go out... She said (and I quote) "Rape is what happens with girls leave home and think it's okay to drink..."

Are you F*ckin' Kidding me? This is a "Rape Advocate" talking? Really??? I don't care if a woman is so blasted she doesn't know her name, or if her back door is wide open - it's still HIS fault that HE raped her! It's not hers! No one asks to be raped... Seriously... This really pisses me off and I'm getting REALLY tired of it.

Answer Question
 
SabrinaMBowen

Asked by SabrinaMBowen at 12:11 PM on Sep. 14, 2010 in Politics & Current Events

Level 40 (122,988 Credits)
Answers (28)
  • Women are still less than men to some people....


    A man doesn't get held accountable for his savage agressive action but the woman for simply going outside to drink...

    sweet-a-kins

    Answer by sweet-a-kins at 12:14 PM on Sep. 14, 2010

  • This is such a double standard. If your 8 year old daughter leaves her bike unlocked and it's stolen, you ask her why she didn't lock the bike. If your 17 year old leaves the keys in the ignition while she runs into the store and her care is stolen, you ask her why she left the keys in the car. So why is it if she's 21, accepts strange drinks from strange men or goes off alone with him and doesn't let anyone else know where she's going, suddenly you don't dare ask her why? Are the bike and car really more valuable than her body and her emotional stability?
    NotPanicking

    Answer by NotPanicking at 12:16 PM on Sep. 14, 2010

  • While I agree with you that it is not a woman's fault, there are things a woman can do to protect herself. I think the rape advocate was saying that girls should be careful to not be a victim.

    The guys are totally responsible for the raping, but girls should be safe to protect themselves.
    SleepingBeautee

    Answer by SleepingBeautee at 12:17 PM on Sep. 14, 2010

  • You know. I think if this "advocate" was a man, I would just blow it off as "he's an ass" but this is not only a woman, but a rape survivor herself... How do you deal with something like that (which I have) and then blame the women? I'm all for learning to protect yourself... I'm all for making sure you are safe. But the idea that if a woman doesn't check her locks every night or has a drink with friends that she deserves to be raped is sickening - coming out of a woman it's even worse!
    SabrinaMBowen

    Comment by SabrinaMBowen (original poster) at 12:18 PM on Sep. 14, 2010

  • While I agree that it's solely the man's fault, it doesn't hurt to teach our daughters to be safe. If you are going to go out and get blasted, you take a friend with you that will stay sober and keep you safe. You do lock your doors and windows.

    It's okay to teach our daughters to do all they can to prevent rape.
    lovinangels

    Answer by lovinangels at 12:19 PM on Sep. 14, 2010

  • How do you deal with something like that (which I have) and then blame the women?

    I think the better question is how do you teach women to accept constructive criticism and sound advice instead of throwing a fit and writing it off as "blaming the woman"?
    NotPanicking

    Answer by NotPanicking at 12:19 PM on Sep. 14, 2010

  • Do you have a link to what she said?
    SleepingBeautee

    Answer by SleepingBeautee at 12:20 PM on Sep. 14, 2010

  • I think it's true that those are all things a woman can do to try to prevent it, but no matter what she is not responsible for the actions of someone else. It's very sad that the consuelor would have that type of attitude- she definitely should be looking for another profession!!
    skittles1108

    Answer by skittles1108 at 12:20 PM on Sep. 14, 2010

  • Yikes. I do think women should be careful at bars and not get drunk, watch their drinks and don't leave wtih guys they don't know. I don't think they can be blamed for rape especially in their own home.
    tabekat

    Answer by tabekat at 12:22 PM on Sep. 14, 2010

  • It doesn't sound a lot like blaming the victim to just do a couple of smart things to be safe. Don't accept drinks from strangers at parties, lock doors although let's face it if someone wants in your house they'll likely figure out a way to get in, don't get so drunk you can't stand up when you're out on the town. The advocate could have handled her words better and even if a woman does get drunk and raped, it's still the fault of the guy who did it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:22 PM on Sep. 14, 2010

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