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Does your kid / S-kid have ..

Differents rules at different houses?

Do you as the BM/SM feel the other is entitled to enforcing different rules? Such as how much TV or computer time is allotted, which shows are age appropriate for the household, cleaning up after ones self, and/or enforcing self hygeine?

OR should the kids/skids have to follow the same rules for both houses?

Im very interested to hear some stories..

Answer Question
 
Mrs_Chris_Pukt

Asked by Mrs_Chris_Pukt at 12:47 PM on Sep. 14, 2010 in Parenting Debate

Level 7 (161 Credits)
Answers (12)
  • I dont have step children, but I would want the same rules at both houses. But thats just me
    lilmoosesmom

    Answer by lilmoosesmom at 12:49 PM on Sep. 14, 2010

  • My son has different rules at my house and when he goes to his Dad's. I am the stricter of the two.
    For me, there just was no reconciling the rules of both houses.
    mommy11260

    Answer by mommy11260 at 12:52 PM on Sep. 14, 2010

  • My ex has our son Friday night through Sunday afternoon so it really makes no sense for me to enforce my bedtime rules and such at his house. We do respect each other though so if one has imposed a punishment such as no TV then we will honor it at our respective homes. The only issue I have I guess is that my ex is far more relaxed on issues such as appropriate movies and structure. He lacks common sense at times.
    Orionsgirl

    Answer by Orionsgirl at 12:52 PM on Sep. 14, 2010

  • My husband and I were divorced when our children were 2 and 5. They didn't start spending weekends until they were 7 and 10. He agreed that they weren't ready. By that time their father had married a woman that loved kids but couldn't have children. We never had problems with rules or behavior. They were good kids and their father learned parenting from me. The only thing that bothered me is they ate worse there and drank soda. If that's the worst, it sure isn't bad. On Sun evening I would expect it to take them time to calm down and settle back in. My kids are now 27 & 30. The step-mother died and their father and I are both single. We get along and are enjoying our 24 mo grandson.

    Gailll

    Answer by Gailll at 12:56 PM on Sep. 14, 2010

  • I never had to deal with it. My ex wasn't allowed to have my daughter unsupervised so different rules didn't apply. I think it's important to have respect for the other home's rules but really it's the decision of each parent what rules they want to enforce in their own home.
    L.A.F.outloud

    Answer by L.A.F.outloud at 12:57 PM on Sep. 14, 2010

  • House rules are house rules. I don't care who the child is, they all have to follow the same rules. I don't have any SKids at the moment, but we are looking at having 2 "foster" kids rather soon, and they will follow the same rules as our kids... I have never seen a reason for different rules for different kids. - That said, we don't have many rules in the first place.
    SabrinaMBowen

    Answer by SabrinaMBowen at 1:03 PM on Sep. 14, 2010

  • My husband and I are together but he has kids with his previous wife...We are ALOT stricter...Perhaps that is why their daughter got pregnant(when with her mom) when she was 15...
    tiger_tatted1

    Answer by tiger_tatted1 at 1:20 PM on Sep. 14, 2010

  • my children and my step children deal with households with VERY different standards and rules. i've always told my kids "my house. my rules.' in other words, they need to learn to abide by the rules that each parent sets forth. it's a lot harder when they're younger, but they DO adapt.
    CFMPprincess

    Answer by CFMPprincess at 7:02 PM on Sep. 14, 2010

  • Well, hous erules are house rules. They go by whose house they are in. Hopefully they are not too helter skelter, or that is when you go back into court. I know when things are really different it doesn't hurt the adults, but does the kids. It is just like at school or at grandmas... They abide by the rules that are set. Most children do just fine with this. It is when the bio parent (not the step parent) will not allow you to parent the house rules to the kids under your roof when things can get tricky.. Especially if you have kids with them too
    Anidawehiwahya

    Answer by Anidawehiwahya at 8:22 PM on Sep. 14, 2010

  • My kids pretty much have the same rules with me and my ex, its my SD (who lives with us and my DD & DS) who has no rules at all. My DH lets his kid do pretty much anything she wants.
    mudlovinme

    Answer by mudlovinme at 9:14 PM on Sep. 14, 2010

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