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2 Bumps

do you believe the words he says when he is mad?

I absoutely love my SO and honesty our relationship is better than its ever been. But he gets upset sometimes and tells me that he can't live with me being who I am. I tend to easily fall into insecurities. Last night I woke up at 2 am and just blurted out "You don't like me, do you?" He got pissed and said he was tired of me, couldn't live with me, and I needed to learn to take care of myself. It was quite painful. And he refused to care. I am a grown woman and I know that he can do what he wants and I should respect his space. I just don't understand why he can be so mean. Today he says he loves me and it will be alright. I just wonder if he really means all he says and just patches things up to stay together. I'd leave him in a heartbeat if I believe he meant the things he said. What do I believe?

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 6:41 PM on Sep. 14, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (9)
  • there can be truth in anything he says, but you never know which is the truth right
    angevil53

    Answer by angevil53 at 6:43 PM on Sep. 14, 2010

  • doesn't matter what I think but I think people have had these thoughts in their head when they blurt them out in anger. Doesn't mean he wants to do anything about it, per se, but maybe he wishes you were more independent, etc.
    jeanclaudia

    Answer by jeanclaudia at 6:44 PM on Sep. 14, 2010

  • I try not to but sometimes the stuff he tells me when hes mad is hard to let go of. That is just how it is for me.
    Suzuki-Mom-of-2

    Answer by Suzuki-Mom-of-2 at 6:50 PM on Sep. 14, 2010

  • i agree with jean i was going to say the same thing. i mean people can love someone but not love some things about them. i mean i have this behavior of buying and returning stuff cause i changed my mind and it drives my husband nuts. in fact we just had a fight over this. i'm sure that he wishes you were not insecure but i'm sure that he still loves you. stop being that way. i know i need to change my behavior
    melody77

    Answer by melody77 at 6:51 PM on Sep. 14, 2010

  • Honestly, it sounds like you need to tell him that the things he is saying is what is making you feel so insecure! Tell him to quit acting like such an ass because he is mad, and you will quit worrying and clinging!
    mommy11260

    Answer by mommy11260 at 7:40 PM on Sep. 14, 2010

  • My SO does the same things. He can be so ungodly hateful that I literally just cry like are you serious right now. But then after he calms down and loves me and cant live without me. Also pulls the I am leaving you shit but if i took anything he said seriously we would of been over a long long time ago. He is a red head with freckles so I think thats normal and I am German Irish and Italian so yeah I'm mean as well.

    lolo0636

    Answer by lolo0636 at 8:15 PM on Sep. 14, 2010

  • When me and my SO fight he says really mean things to me and it hurts my feeling really badly and after our fight is over I need to have reassurance from him cuz I was hurt so bad
    noahsmommy12908

    Answer by noahsmommy12908 at 11:53 PM on Sep. 14, 2010

  • In my honest and humble opinion, why would he just blurt them out if he wasn't thinking of them to begin with? I think there is more truth behind the angry things he blurts out than he wants you to know, or you want to admit. I am sorry and I hope everything works out ok for you in the end. I don't mean to sound harsh in my answer, I'm just saying what I know from personal experience.
    QueenMomma2023

    Answer by QueenMomma2023 at 5:14 PM on Sep. 15, 2010

  • Alot of crap gets said out of anger, to hurt, to make ya mad, to rev you up, that's their way of really getting to you because females are very sensitive to this & its wrong because then you are so unsure of the relationship and always wondering & insecure. When it blows over have a serious talk with him & tell him you can not handle that anymore and you are not into games! and if he really means it then bye bye baby! cuz it won't work & not good for YOU. Good Luck.
    sarasmommy777

    Answer by sarasmommy777 at 8:52 PM on Sep. 15, 2010

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