Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

i need some advice!

ok, My husband and I are happily married with 3 kids. We have came into a financial bind, and needing money for the holidays. Someone suggested to my husband going to a sperm bank and they pay you $350 each time. my husband really wants to do this, because its "EASY' money. I dont know if i feel comfortable with this,.. what would you ladies do? would you do this for the money?
NOTE: please dont tell me for us to get a job. I work, and my husband has 2 jobs, one being his career. Bad choices from when we were young has caused us to have bad credit, and now we are just needing that extra holiday cash.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 10:21 AM on Oct. 17, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (18)
  • no. i would feel like someone else would be getting MY child.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:22 AM on Oct. 17, 2008

  • if its anonymous? i guess.... i wouldnt let my husband do it though... i mean the thought of him getting someone else pregnant is odd.... but alot of females will probably be greatfull that he does do it, think of how many people want to have babies but cant... its something you have to decide together..

    Answer by wisteriastars at 10:24 AM on Oct. 17, 2008

  • I would not do it because I am prolife and many of these donation will become frozen embryos, which may be destroyed or used in research.

    Answer by chrispy_nd at 10:25 AM on Oct. 17, 2008

  • lol. chrispy, sperm is not a child (im also prolife). sperm goes to waist everyday! like say when you have protected sure you do that! lol.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:30 AM on Oct. 17, 2008

  • You ability to provide for your existing children supercedes any potential embryos those sperm may or may not produce. I say go for it.

    Answer by cdgoldilocks at 10:33 AM on Oct. 17, 2008

  • wow.. that would be weird for me.. for some reason i figured only single guys in college did stuff like that. i would have a hard time with it because i feel like we have the bond we do because we have our boys together and to think that some other woman out there had one of his babies too.. that may bother me... especially since its becoming popular for people to try and find their biological kids dad through the sperm bank... and one day, he may change from annonymous and decide to put himself out there to be found and then what? you have strangers sending a pic of a child that is your husbands? i don't know... i couldn't let him do it... then again, maybe i could...

    Answer by momsamillion at 10:33 AM on Oct. 17, 2008

    I think the hardest part would be knowing the possiblity of him really having another child out there, and one day this child coming to find him. I would accept this child, but it would be weird, and for years to come, wonder if this process did work... ugh! its so weird to think. I really am confused at what to do!

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:40 AM on Oct. 17, 2008

  • That is what I would be worried about. If someday down the road, the child found out who the father was and came looking for him and expected money from you or something. (I did in fact see something about that on 20/20 or Dateline) That would be really really hard. And I wouldn't want my husband doing that and thinking everyday "does he have another child out there?"

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:10 AM on Oct. 17, 2008

  • Instead of sperm donation, try to find a plasma donation center in your area. That is what my husband and I do for extra money. The plasma saves lives and you don't have to worry about stuff like that. (They also pay you)

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:11 AM on Oct. 17, 2008

  • I would like to ask you how old your children are? Are they old enough to know what Christmas is REALLY about?? I've had tough times in my life and had to learn what the true meaning of Christmas is. To me, its not gifts. Its showing love, being w/ loved ones, having a good meal, and sharing good friendships. Most importantly its the birth of Jesus. My husband going to a sperm bank for Christmas money, I don't think I could live w/ that.. But that's just me.. I would wonder the rest of my life "what if"?? I do wish you lots of luck on your decision.. :)

    Answer by honeys_sugamama at 11:25 AM on Oct. 17, 2008

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.