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5 Bumps

too soon to date?

My husband and father of my son passed away in March. ... I am now dating and very serious with a new man... after posting pics of our weekend get-a-way... I got some not so nice comments about how I need to take it slow....

I am young and I know what i want....I love this man he is amazing !!!

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 10:02 AM on Sep. 15, 2010 in Parenting Debate

Answers (18)
  • careful its not just a Rebound thing. Not fair to either of you.

    Answer by Zoeyis at 10:03 AM on Sep. 15, 2010

  • People feel free to judge, but truthfully only you know when you are ready to move on. You should be sure of what you want (that is only fair to both of you), but that being said, if you are sure of what you want, it is no one else's place to judge you or try and make that decision for you.

    Answer by mommy11260 at 10:06 AM on Sep. 15, 2010

  • Agree with the above poster. Be careful and make absolutely sure this isn't a rebound thing. Otherwise, 5-6 months can be enough, depending on the circumstances. My father dated within that time frame after my mother died (after 35 years of marriage), dated for a while; they were married 13 years, until he passed away. No one answer is right for all.

    Answer by mikesmom65270 at 10:07 AM on Sep. 15, 2010

  • I'm someone who has never had a real date in her life, so this probably doesn't mean much coming from me. But if this person makes you feel truly happy, then you shouldn't stop being with him just because of what other people think. It's like this quote I once read that was written by an anonymous child: "Good men won't make you cry, and the ones who do make you cry just aren't worth it."

    Answer by Marikosan at 10:11 AM on Sep. 15, 2010


    Answer by angeldeb2010 at 10:14 AM on Sep. 15, 2010

  • Don't throw away a chance at something good just because it doesn't fit into other people's timeline for your life. Just be careful emotionally.

    Answer by riotgrrl at 10:17 AM on Sep. 15, 2010

  • I'm sure your husband would want you to be happy. If this man is truly what you want and you're ready, then don't worry about what the bitching nay-sayers say. Their opinions really don't matter.

    Answer by PaganMommy04 at 10:31 AM on Sep. 15, 2010

  • IMO yes.

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 10:56 AM on Sep. 15, 2010

  • I think it's too soon. Not just for you, but maybe for your son? (you didn't say how old he is) My dad died when I was 7, when I was 9 my mom married an amazing man who made an incredible stepdad for me. I understand her reasons for doing it (he was getting a new/better job and was going to be moving, she wanted us to move with him, and she was lonely!), but I do wish she had waited longer to give ME more time to adjust.

    Answer by missanc at 12:46 PM on Sep. 15, 2010

  • Yes it's soon. You should be careful, but some times the best things are unexpected. Don't live your life by every one else's code. This decision the only two that matter are you and your child. As long as you both are ok with it, and it's not to soon it doesn't matter what any one else thinks/

    Answer by hot-mama86 at 12:46 PM on Sep. 15, 2010

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