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4 Bumps

Do you think this is right? Sometimes I feel like mothers let their kids....

hangout more with kids who have parents they like. For instance if your child had a friend who is really nice and your child liked the kid, would you let them spend less time together because you don't like the mother/father. The parents are not harmful you just aren't friends with them. What if your child would rather hang out with this kid but your steering him towards the kids whose parents you like. Is that fair to your child and the other kids. I ask because sometimes I feel like that's how it is for my son, he has a lot of friends but I think they spend less time with him because the mothers don't like me.

Answer Question
 
mom-de-uno

Asked by mom-de-uno at 10:45 AM on Sep. 15, 2010 in Parenting Debate

Level 14 (1,812 Credits)
Answers (26)
  • I am the opposite. I care more about how the kid acts as opposed to how his parents act. My son is friends with and goes to friends houses with mom's I really don't care for.
    BradenIsMySon

    Answer by BradenIsMySon at 10:46 AM on Sep. 15, 2010

  • No. I wouldn't let my relationship with their friends parents interfere with their relationship what-so-ever. I don't have to spend time with their parents if I don't want to, but that's no reason for me to be selfish and keep my child from seeing their friends. I don't think that's fair at all, it's selfish.
    GinNTonic

    Answer by GinNTonic at 10:47 AM on Sep. 15, 2010

  • i guess you'd have to ask yourself 'why don't they like me? what have i done?'..if you come up with an answer quickly, then you can fix the problem. i'd never try to assume something about my the mother of ds's friends, without actually knowing what i was looking at. if you haven't gotten to know each other, perhaps now's the time..for the sake of the kids, eh??
    dullscissors

    Answer by dullscissors at 10:48 AM on Sep. 15, 2010

  • I agree with Braden. If I thought the kid was a bad influence than yeah I would steer mine towards having better friends, but if the kid is alright but the parents just aren't, what can you really do except hope that your child makes good choices for themself.
    GinNTonic

    Answer by GinNTonic at 10:49 AM on Sep. 15, 2010

  • If it was just a personality thing, I could care less. I don't have to be buddy-buddy with their friends' parents. I do make sure that even if we are not going to be spending time together that lines of communication are open so that I feel comfortable with my child spending time with them and that we could communicate if there were issues.
    riotgrrl

    Answer by riotgrrl at 10:49 AM on Sep. 15, 2010

  • Why would I want to choose who my kids hang out with? Of course I dont want them to hang out with 'bad' influences but I'm not going to tell them they cant hang out with so and so because I'm not friends with their parent!
    SabrenaLeigh

    Answer by SabrenaLeigh at 10:51 AM on Sep. 15, 2010

  • I think u r right. I would rather my kids be w/ ppl I like.
    KARRIEMARIE

    Answer by KARRIEMARIE at 10:51 AM on Sep. 15, 2010

  • I get the vibe other parents don't like me as much too. My kids are still little, but I always try and spark a conversation with the parents at the school. I get a lot of dirty looks at drop off and pick up. I have not said anything bad to my knowledge. I smile as I walk to seem more approachable....
    I will remember this post. I don't think this is something I would do, but sometimes the way you feel really puts a damper on how you act.. so I will think twice...even if I don't like the parent.
    ABusyBee

    Answer by ABusyBee at 10:53 AM on Sep. 15, 2010

  • Our neighbors are very poor parents and you can tell by the way their children act. My son is only allowed to play with the one that is his age when they are in my house being supervised. My son is 7, the neighbor boy is 8. DS is not allowed at their house.
    motherofpearls

    Answer by motherofpearls at 10:54 AM on Sep. 15, 2010

  • It depends on the age of the child. My 3 year old hangs out with kids whose parents I like mostly because I am not just dropping her off and I don't want to have to sit through an hour playdate with some one I don't like. My 5 year old is now making friends at school and I would gladly let him play with kids I don't necessarily like the parents. It also depends on why I don't like the parents. If it is something about they way they parent then I would limit my child's exposure to that too.
    aeneva

    Answer by aeneva at 10:54 AM on Sep. 15, 2010

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