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21, single mom of 1 yo twin boys living w/ my parents. looking for support from someone whose been there.

I've tried posting in the groups or whatever on here and it seems like the groups are dead or something, I just haven't found anyone whose been where I am and I really need some support/advice etc

I'm 21 single mom of twin boys who just turned one, (YESTERDAY! :) ) and I'm still living with my parents.

I really want to move out for numorous reasons, but I don't think I can do it.
My only source of income is my financial aid, which is mostly loans :/
I'm working on getting at least a parttime job so I can get daycare because right now my mom watches them while I'm in school because she isn't working. its really hard on everyone, espessially her and it's really put a strain in our relationship. we just fight so much.

idk what to do. I don't feel like I could manage if I moved out.

has anyone else out there managed with two toddlers on their own? what did you do?
what should I do????

Answer Question
 
ElsaSalsaaa

Asked by ElsaSalsaaa at 12:14 PM on Sep. 15, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 20 (9,139 Credits)
Answers (3)
  • Not with 2 toddlers, only with one, but there is hope :0) i know its hard, but don't rush to get out. Every time i've tried, i only end up going back and it makes me feel worse. If you want to help your mom out, check to see if they have a CCMS program thru the YWCA in your area. I'm not exactly sure where your from so i don't know if every state has it. But if they do, apply for daycare benefits. it'll help you tremendously especially since you're going to school and want to find a job! they do have a waiting list, but time flies by so the sooner you can get on it the better. It'll at least give your mom some time off and help your relationship out a bit. If they have housing in your area too, i'd try that and just wait out the time frame till you can get help. Once you're out of school and have a better job, then you can think of going completely on your own. As for your mom, just let her know how grateful you are.
    jolee0222

    Answer by jolee0222 at 12:25 PM on Sep. 15, 2010

  • File for child support. Apply for section 8 housing. Rent is based on income. There may be issues since you are a student. The wait for section 8 may be months to years. Some complexes are very nice. Consider counseling for you and your mother to get along. Since you are probably on Medicaid counseling would be free for you and they would probably let your mother come with you. My son has bipolar disorder and he is 22 and I always go to his appointments with him. At the mental health clinic where he goes they have many groups and other things like yoga, meditation, stress management, and similar programs and they are all free if you are a client. At the community mental health clinics they have case managers that help you find community resources.

    Gailll

    Answer by Gailll at 12:26 PM on Sep. 15, 2010

  • well when i was 17 i got kicked out with my newborn i moved in with my step mom and the whole mom babysitting my baby got easier for her because we didnt live there anymore so she didnt have to deal with hearing my kid 24/7. i was also going to school and i had a full time job ....my mom watched the baby while i was in school and my step mom watched my baby while i was at work.....so is there a family member you can move in with that has an extra room? just ask whatever family you have to help you thats what they are there for...you are going to school so its not like your a dead beat.........it is very expensive to live on you own...i didnt successfully live on my own till i was 19...but i always had family to help me out with money and babysittig i never had to pay a dime for babysitting.....im sorry your havin a hard time but it does get better...i promise!!!!!
    KME3

    Answer by KME3 at 12:30 PM on Sep. 15, 2010

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