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If you are separated and he says theres still a chance what should I do?

We are living in separate houses, we have two children, and I know we love each other very much, but we constantly argue. I think we don't communicate, but he doesn't want to see a counselor yet he said. What should I do?

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Asked by shsutterfield at 4:38 PM on Sep. 15, 2010 in Relationships

Level 5 (74 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • Move on, you don't have to find some one new but you do need to be strong and independant for your children. If it's ment to be it will be but you can't wait. It's not fair to you or your children and he is selfish for saying maybe when he isn't trying.

    Answer by DonnaPinitonya at 4:41 PM on Sep. 15, 2010

  • If he isn't willing to jump into conselling, he's just trying to get you back. I would be leary even if he did agree to go. He probly just misses the things that when you were there he didn't have to do, or a lonely bed.

    Answer by Sarasmoonflower at 4:44 PM on Sep. 15, 2010

  • I say if he doesn't want to try and get help now than he may never do it. I would move on and focus on your children. If he wants to be a part of your life and his kids lives he will try to harder on his relationship with you. But that doesn't mean you should wait around for him. As the PP said you don't have to find someone new but you do need stand strong for yourself and your children.

    Answer by lil_Army_Wife05 at 4:47 PM on Sep. 15, 2010

  • He's not willing to get help. What good is a marriage where you argue all the time? You can still love someone from a distance!

    Answer by mom2mybabes at 5:26 PM on Sep. 15, 2010

  • I'd go to counseling without him. Sometimes, it's not so much making the other person change. We have to change ourselves before expecting someone else to change. Then if he still isn't willing to work on things then you have a tough decision to make.

    Answer by lioness3e at 7:46 PM on Sep. 15, 2010

  • Counseling should help both, I would at least try it. It will help clear up any feelings and maybe your love for him is love but maybe he's just confusing comfort for love. Some guys do, and sometimes it's vise versa. But at least though counseling you'll be able to understand one another better.
    Don't mean to hurt any one's feelings, but it's something to consider.

    Answer by Danaefm at 7:55 PM on Sep. 15, 2010

  • don't give in. if you think you need counseling, tell him you love him but in order to explore further possibilities he has to be willing to go to counseling, you obviously don't have the tools to solve the problems yourselves or they would be solved...

    Answer by figaro8895 at 9:05 PM on Sep. 15, 2010

  • You need to communicate better with him. That is crucial in a relationship. I hope things get better for yall. GL

    Answer by noahsmommy12908 at 9:38 PM on Sep. 15, 2010

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