Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

2 Bumps

I just don't know how I'm going to deal with all this

So me and my bf are on the outs. We haven't been getting along for months and we are both sick of it. We are going to see how this weekend goes and make a decision, but I have a feeling that it's not going to end well. We have a 2 yr old daughter together. My daughter is so clingy to me so screams bloody murder when she leaves with her dad so we talked about it and we figured out that if we do break up he will have to see her when I'm around. I just don't know how I'm going to be able to be around him a few times a week, and him not being my boyfriend. I just don't know how I'm going to deal with him being in my life the rest of the life, and not being my bf. How do other single moms do it?

 
Trishy7

Asked by Trishy7 at 10:07 PM on Sep. 15, 2010 in Relationships

Level 10 (472 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (7)
  • ok, I have SO been here. When my sons *cough choke sputter* "faaaather" (sperm donor) and I split when my son was just little(3) he would do the same thing. Scream and yell and just throw a tantrum the whole time he was with the man. Not that he ever did anything with his child. Anyways, what it came down to is I just had him over to our house and I went to my room to read or caught up on housework and let them do their thing where they were comfortable. After awhile they started going for short walks, then to the play ground, then for short outings. Eventually they would spend some time away from home and my son was ok. It was a long process.
    1lv2stks3nlz4ev

    Answer by 1lv2stks3nlz4ev at 5:01 AM on Sep. 16, 2010

  • You just need to be strong and just deal with it
    noahsmommy12908

    Answer by noahsmommy12908 at 10:09 PM on Sep. 15, 2010

  • gosh what a pain, hey i have been thru this before. don't disregard your daughter's feelings and acting out--it may not be JUSt clinginess, she may REALLY not want to go with Dad fo rsome reason you dont know about (yelling, treatment of her, behaviorsm, loud music, ignoring her etc). she cant tell you and so is screaming about it. you dont knwo if he resents her in some way or not because of your problems with him so watch that. studies show this i have researched extensively and have been thru it.
    silverelf

    Answer by silverelf at 10:11 PM on Sep. 15, 2010

  • i know it sucks...u should move on now that ur daughter is still very young when the grow up they start to ask questions like why do u guys fight to much...sometimes its better to be apart...fighting and arguing could really affect ur little girl growing up...
    nicoleNjeanna

    Answer by nicoleNjeanna at 10:20 PM on Sep. 15, 2010

  • Bless your Heart,This is a Situation thats Hard to Give a Answer to.If He really Loves you as Much as he says then I believe the Both of you can work it out.But honestly if it cant maybe this was not meant to be.He needs to Realize that Being a Mom is a Full time Job not to mention very Straineus on You. Maybe some time apart would be Good for You and Him.What if you go see a Spiritual Adviser? they might can help you
    Darlasuttles

    Answer by Darlasuttles at 10:14 PM on Sep. 15, 2010

  • I'm sending you a hug. I don't know what else to do.
    nicole_Evans

    Answer by nicole_Evans at 10:16 PM on Sep. 15, 2010

  • Thank you guys so much!!!
    Sliverelf I think your completly right. I'm always doing something with our daughter (going to the park, libary, playing, reading, painting, ext) n he just likes it sit around and have her watch tv in her room while he is in the living room. This is one of our biggest issues is him making us a priotity.
    Daralasuttles- I've meantented conseuling, but he doesn't think talking to a stranger will help so. And I don't think men will ever understand what us moms do.
    nicoleNjeanna- Your completly right. I don't want to fight around her at all and feel that tension! It just going to be so hard one day him being my bf and the next him not be but still having to be around him :-/ I have to think what is best for our daughter and this isn't what is best.
    Trishy7

    Comment by Trishy7 (original poster) at 10:34 PM on Sep. 15, 2010