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How can I get my husband to help me out around the house?

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momma_alie20

Asked by momma_alie20 at 2:43 AM on Sep. 16, 2010 in Relationships

Level 13 (992 Credits)
Answers (4)
  • Give him direct, short instructions.

    Don't hint. Don't ask questions. Don't explain the reasons.

    People, in general, respond best to clear leadership and direction. There is no reason to be nasty or dictatorial about it, but clear, brief instructions like 'please take the garbage out now that there is a commercial break' or 'please sweep the floor when you're done putting away the dishes' are orders, not questions --they don't need explanations, they're polite and strongly imply you have a plan and expect help executing it.

    Never, ever, ask anyone to do anything that you believe is beneath you. You do not have slaves or underlings and they will always resist being treated as such by being told to do what you believe is the work of minions. You don't have minions, either.
    LindaClement

    Answer by LindaClement at 2:47 AM on Sep. 16, 2010

  • Yeah... see Im 38 weeks preggers... So Im just not as capable of doing even some small things like I used to. All I ask for is help... but it seems like by time he is ready to even get around to doing anything, I have already cleaned the whole house... ex. I have asked for 3 days for him to vaccum (I would but my back aches BAD afterward) and it still hasnt gotten done :( Dishes pile high as well as the garbage and I find myself doing Most if not ALL the housework.... Im terrified that nothing is gonna change after I have my c section and I dont know how I will handle that... trying to heal as well as clean the whole house :(
    momma_alie20

    Comment by momma_alie20 (original poster) at 2:53 AM on Sep. 16, 2010

  • You really need to voice this to your hubby tell him what you have told us. He should be helping you out regardless of the fact that your preggo or not. Do you have someone close by just in case that can come over to your house after you have the baby to give you a hand so you can heal and not have to worry about your hubby being a lazy ass. I would see if your mother or a good friend can came and help you out with stuff cause you don't think you can depend on your hubby. Does your hubby understand that you really need to come home and relax and allow your self to heal or you will open your belly right back up again. You need to worry about healing and the baby that's it he needs to take care of the rest cooking cleaning it all.Explain this to him. GL momma

    raemommy

    Answer by raemommy at 3:18 AM on Sep. 16, 2010

  • Take a piece of printer paper, and with a black sharpi, make a short list, so like 10 things and next to it put what day it needs to be done by. Sounds like you man just doesnt get it and you SHOULDNT be letting him get away with it. He knows that you will eventually get to it because it will bug you.
    See if you can get his mom to help you, tell her that you just dont want to bug him because he such a hard working man... She might just help you give him the boost he needs to get off of his CABOOSE!!
    Especially after the baby is born, make sure you have help around, dont let them hold the baby when they ask if there is anything they can do, their asking because they want to help. And YOU will feel guilty but let them do the dishes or vacum. Vacuming is very hard to do after a C section ( I had one I know what Im talking about, I had an 8 lb vacum that I couldnt move).
    My DH didnt get it until I brought in re-enforcements.
    browningmom

    Answer by browningmom at 3:55 AM on Sep. 16, 2010

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