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Where does God go when....

I am a new mom. My husband works nights so I am alone with our newborn son who has some very special needs. I haven't been able to sleep for more than an hour at a time in 3 weeks. Money is tight (but who isnt strapped for cash these days) which is why my husband works nights. We've been looking for a home church but we still dont have one. I'm stressed beyond belief, broken hearted, isolated and ashamed. The last two nights after hours upon hours of inconsoleable crying (both me and my baby) I cut my wrists. Not to try to kill myslef. Just to release my anger and frustration. I know this is a horrible way to cope. I feel ashamed and frustrated even more so by my desperate pleas prior to cutting for some help. I feel abandoned and ashamed of the cuts on my wrist. I know cant keep doing this but nothing seems to get better. Is God still here? Did He leave when I cut myself or what?

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:50 PM on Oct. 17, 2008 in Religion & Beliefs

This question is closed.
Answers (21)
  • No sweetheart, I promise God is still with you. Though times are really hard Right now, he still loves you. I was once told that when you pray to God for something, he doesn't straight give it to you, but he gives you the opportunity to obtain it yourself. Time will come when you see that opportunity, but you have to keep your eyes and heart open to see it. I also agree that you should talk to a doctor about postpartum depression. Don'T feel ashamed, I was too depressed and only got an hour of sleep at a time with my son wen he was first born. Sleep will come soon enough. Keep praying to God, he will listen to your prayers. And I will also pray for you too.

    cloud144

    Answer by cloud144 at 10:59 PM on Oct. 17, 2008

  • You need to talk to a Dr. about postpartum depression.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:52 PM on Oct. 17, 2008

  • No he was right there with you sweetie. HE never left you at all. And he never will. But you need to cry out to Him! He doesn't want you to cut yourself, he wants you to seek him! I think you should be talking to a counselor. And I'll post a link here to find a church in your area. I attend a church called Calvary, it is non-denominational and they teach the bible, nothing else. Good luck hon and message me if you want to talk to someone.

    http://calvarychapel.com/?page=churches
    feesharose

    Answer by feesharose at 10:53 PM on Oct. 17, 2008

  • You need to get some help, sweetie, before you really hurt yourself. Call a friend or relative and see if they can come over and watch the baby so you can sleep for a few hours. After that, you will probably think a little clearer and feel somewhat refreshed. Then make yourself a drs. appointment for first thing in the morning. You're in a very stressful situation right now, as if being a new mom wasn't stressful enough! If you ever want to talk, pm me, I have lots of experience with depression.
    mamapotter

    Answer by mamapotter at 11:00 PM on Oct. 17, 2008

  • God has not left you. The God I know is loving faithful compassionate and provides our basic needs. This is a time of trial. Rebuke the enemies lies doubt fear rushing thoughts. Listen to God he stills you guides you he is closer to you know. Be still and know he is God. I know it seems hard but spend time in the Word . I've had difficult times so I understand. DONT lose faith.
    JCRestoredme

    Answer by JCRestoredme at 11:04 PM on Oct. 17, 2008

  • cloud144 said it the best! God is still here and he is with you always! With that said you still need to talk to your Dr about depression! Call your Dr Office!! Good Luck.... (Don't worry many of us have been there before)
    SAHMinIL

    Answer by SAHMinIL at 11:04 PM on Oct. 17, 2008

  • You are not alone. There are many Moms to reach out to -- here and in your community. Definitely talk to your doctor about depression. If you're not nursing you can ask your hubby to take a shift so you can take a sleep aid and get a good solid rest. Depression is nothing to be ashamed of - hormones from pregnancy, lack of sleep, change of life event, stress - it all makes perfect sense to be depressed. Please get help for it. I am not religious but I can say I've heard "God helps those that help themselves." There is no reason for you to go through this alone -- take the advice here and find help for you.
    Serafyna

    Answer by Serafyna at 11:12 PM on Oct. 17, 2008

  • hey please message me so we can talk I know what u are going though so please send me a message/
    hinson7169

    Answer by hinson7169 at 11:12 PM on Oct. 17, 2008

  • Please talk to someone who can help you; a professional. NOW. My friend just killed himself last week. I spent today at his Memorial Service. I can tell you without a doubt, GOD HAS NOT LEFT YOU, THE ENEMY JUST WANTS YOU TO THINK YOU'RE ALONE!!!! Please, I'm begging you, honor yourself, your family, your God, by talking to someone and letting it out. There is NO SHAME in getting help; aside from the probable post partum depression, they can give you other resources like a Moms club to help you with fellowship, financial assistance programs, etc. Please talk to someone. Don't do to your community what my friend just did to us. You can't take it back. As my MIL said, It was a long term solution to a short term problem. I'll pray for you to make it through.
    ChefMom94

    Answer by ChefMom94 at 11:14 PM on Oct. 17, 2008

  • GOD HAS NOT left you! He is with you all the time. You need to start praying and tell God to take that stuff out of you and get it out of your mind. God loves you and he doesn't want to see you do that to the temple of God. That old devil is who is putting that in your head and you are giving in to him. DON"T DO IT..... for God! Everyone is going through tough times right now, but hey....we WILL get through it. It may just be a test of faith for you. I will be praying for you. God Bless you!
    ProudMommie87

    Answer by ProudMommie87 at 11:45 PM on Oct. 17, 2008