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3 Bumps

How can you cope with living with your husband when he wants a divorce, but you have no where else to go?

When I started to regain hope that my marriage was going to work, my husband told me that he doesn't want me anymore, that he wants a divorce, that he doesn't love me anymore, etc. We're great friends, but it's so hard staying here knowing that stuff. I don't have anywhere else to go, and I can't afford to move out with our daughter because I'm in college full time with a weird schedule, so I can't work right now. Even if I could, I have no one to watch my daughter except while I'm in class. Does anyone have any advice about how I can deal with this?

 
Mrs.BAT

Asked by Mrs.BAT at 5:25 PM on Sep. 16, 2010 in Relationships

Level 38 (105,028 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (19)
  • This is hard I went through a similar situation with my husband and I can say in the end we decided not to break up. What we did was sit down and discuss that we didn't want to be together but moving out wasnt an option at the moment so we needed to be nice to each other for our son's sake and individually focus on what we needed to do to move on. So talk to him tell him ok if thats what you want but I can't move out and I can't afford to take care of things on my own. If he really doesn't want to be there then he will leave and if he is a real man he won't leave you and your daughter with no way money to eat and pay rent and if he does then go apply for assistance and take him to court. Im sorry your going through this but things have a way of working themselves out. Good Luck!
    junebug26

    Answer by junebug26 at 5:31 PM on Sep. 16, 2010

  • Sounds like you need to hang in there Mrs.BAT. Since you are still friends, there might be hope. Good luck to you.
    tasches

    Answer by tasches at 5:27 PM on Sep. 16, 2010

  • i would say don't give up. you're still living in the same house. all marriages go though ups and downs. i think you should do what junebug says. sit him down and get him talking. a lot of people end up getting back together after the first two years anyway. stay faithful and just keep trying to be friends. try to find out if theres another women in the picture. you need all the info you can get and if theres some kind of marriage counseling available, like at your church , go, even if it's without him. you can't control him but you can control how you react to him and in this situation.
    binker55

    Answer by binker55 at 5:49 PM on Sep. 16, 2010

  • im sorry you are going through this but yes i agree with binker55 i think if you know that theirs no other female involve go for it and try it i knwo iys hard for you to hear those words come out of your hubby. i hurd them once my SO told me he just didnt have the same feelings anymore and how he just didnt want to end up hurting me, but i didnt give up i talked to him seriously when he told me that if their was another female involved or soemthngi he said no and then i asked what were the reasons why he just didnt have the feelings anymore he did tell me that he just didnt feel right anymore we did the same things everyday nothin new how he just didnt want to live his life the sae way everyday. we didnt really have much time anymroe since we had just had my first son and i know i just didnt want to do anything harder since iw as extremly tired he did tell me he wanted to try and make it work. so we started over we would go
    Alejandra10

    Answer by Alejandra10 at 6:40 PM on Sep. 16, 2010

  • out in dates alone just me and him my mom had alwasy wanted to keep my son for a weekend since they lived kind of far so we would take him over there once a montha dn we would spend the weekend in ourself i started feeling so much better about myself not just like a mom but a women to i would get pretty again and feel sexy. i think you should go for it find the old you the one he fell in love soemtimes we fall into a routine that we all get tired. and think aboutit do you love him or your just scare to stay alone? eventualy things might work out my and my SO are even better than how we were when we first were dating. butyou need to make sure their is nobody else involve and that he is willing to try and make sure you take it step by step dont expect the i love you or the passionate kiss to be on the first date. go old school to when you were dating hm how things would eventually happen best of lucks and i hope things work out
    Alejandra10

    Answer by Alejandra10 at 6:44 PM on Sep. 16, 2010

  • awww im so sorry, what a horrible thing to go through. i agree with everything junebug says, sounds like she knows wat she is talking about. good luck x
    otoole

    Answer by otoole at 5:35 PM on Sep. 16, 2010

  • I have been through the same situation but only had to stay in the house with my ex for 12 days...we were still friends but now he is a total a**. Is there another woman already in the picture with him? If not I would say try to work it out, if he wants the same. Go back to just dating again & see what happens, maybe see why u fell in love in the first place? Just a suggestion because if there had not been another woman in the picture with my husband already, I would have tried 2 work it out but I'm glad I see his true colors now. you can write me anytime u would like 2 talk.
    mama2005

    Answer by mama2005 at 5:35 PM on Sep. 16, 2010

  • I wrote my last response before I had seen what u said about him not wanting to work it out.........sry but it will get better trust me.
    mama2005

    Answer by mama2005 at 5:37 PM on Sep. 16, 2010

  • It must be painful, but you gotta do what you gotta do that is good for you and your child for now. Things will get better, good luck hon, this has to be very hard on you.......

    zbee

    Answer by zbee at 5:38 PM on Sep. 16, 2010

  • Sounds like my past-exactly..
    JaydnsMom22

    Answer by JaydnsMom22 at 5:30 PM on Sep. 16, 2010

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